Beauty For Ashes!

to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God,

to comfort all who mourn,3and provide for those who grieve in Zion—

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,

the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

                                                                         (Isaiah 61:2,3 NIV)

In the last eight years my life has been  filled with pain, loss and a lot of hellish moments. I went from living life like the Jeffersons to Good Times. I went from depending on the world as my source to understanding God is my source. I went from being religious to finding a deeper  spiritual connection with God. I went from pleasing everyone else to understanding the power of self-care. 

I had a lot of friends but, as I grew I began to downsize. I went from not recognizing my worth to knowing my worth. I went from undervaluing my gift to valuing my gift. I use to have low self-esteem now I am confident & realize what I deserve. I needed other people to validate my life now I live my life according to my own rules with God's approval. I found myself minding everyone else business until I learned the power in minding my own business. 

Recently, this year I went through the loss of a family member. I cannot say I am fully recovered but I gave myself time to step back & heal my way. I believe in the power of rising above challenges because what you go through grows you. 

 I strive to be my true self no longer rejecting parts of myself to make other people feel comfortable. In this time in my life I am okay with the woman I am becoming.  I decided to take control of my life, be happy and  make adjustments along the way.

There are six valuable lessons I learned in my life :

1) You cannot do anything without God. If you think you can I guarantee you will be miserable. I know because I tried this method already.

2) Stop comparing yourself to others because you are you. When you start focusing on your own life you become happier and realize how blessed you really are in life. 

3) Other opinions do not matter. People have the right to express themselves anyway they want but try not to take other people opinions personal. You do not need other people to validate you. 

4) Superhero Syndrome. I use to feel like I had to save everyone and go out of my way to make sure they were okay. However, I found out it is not meant for me to save everyone. The people the Lord put in my path are the ones I am assigned too. 

5) Heal Your Way. Do not let people tell you how to grieve. Give yourself time to heal properly. It is okay not to be okay.

6) Let God In. God is a gentleman if you want him to be apart of your life He will be. He is just waiting for you to invite him in.

My life is a constant journey but in my journey the Lord has constantly gave me beauty for my life ashes.

Until Next Time Live Bold. Live Loud. Live Authentically. 

Beauty For Ashes!

to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God,

to comfort all who mourn,3and provide for those who grieve in Zion—

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,

the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

                                                                         (Isaiah 61:2,3 NIV)

In the last eight years my life has been  filled with pain, loss and a lot of hellish moments. I went from living life like the Jeffersons to Good Times. I went from depending on the world as my source to understanding God is my source. I went from being religious to finding a deeper  spiritual connection with God. I went from pleasing everyone else to understanding the power of self-care. 

I had a lot of friends but, as I grew I began to downsize. I went from not recognizing my worth to knowing my worth. I went from undervaluing my gift to valuing my gift. I use to have low self-esteem now I am confident & realize what I deserve. I needed other people to validate my life now I live my life according to my own rules with God's approval. I found myself minding everyone else business until I learned the power in minding my own business. 

Recently, this year I went through the loss of a family member. I cannot say I am fully recovered but I gave myself time to step back & heal my way. I believe in the power of rising above challenges because what you go through grows you. 

 I strive to be my true self no longer rejecting parts of myself to make other people feel comfortable. In this time in my life I am okay with the woman I am becoming.  I decided to take control of my life, be happy and  make adjustments along the way.

There are six valuable lessons I learned in my life :

1) You cannot do anything without God. If you think you can I guarantee you will be miserable. I know because I tried this method already.

2) Stop comparing yourself to others because you are you. When you start focusing on your own life you become happier and realize how blessed you really are in life. 

3) Other opinions do not matter. People have the right to express themselves anyway they want but try not to take other people opinions personal. You do not need other people to validate you. 

4) Superhero Syndrome. I use to feel like I had to save everyone and go out of my way to make sure they were okay. However, I found out it is not meant for me to save everyone. The people the Lord put in my path are the ones I am assigned too. 

5) Heal Your Way. Do not let people tell you how to grieve. Give yourself time to heal properly. It is okay not to be okay.

6) Let God In. God is a gentleman if you want him to be apart of your life He will be. He is just waiting for you to invite him in.

My life is a constant journey but in my journey the Lord has constantly gave me beauty for my life ashes.

Until Next Time Live Bold. Live Loud. Live Authentically. 

October Theme: Healing, wHoleness & Happiness!

The month of October has came in with a bang and so has our theme for this month. In this month our theme is Healing, wHoleness & Happiness. We will discuss the importance of taking your time to heal, how healing creates a sense of wholeness & why healing is connected to your life happiness.

October Theme: Healing, wHoleness & Happiness!

The month of October has came in with a bang and so has our theme for this month. In this month our theme is Healing, wHoleness & Happiness. We will discuss the importance of taking your time to heal, how healing creates a sense of wholeness & why healing is connected to your life happiness.

Romancing The Stone of Your Life

It was obvious I was lost in translation on this path of finding my purpose. I spent years trying to search for what fulfilled my soul but I was clueless. I needed something to reignite my fire. What was I missing? Uhm....it dawned on me, I was missing passion.

If I could retrace my steps, I lost my passion at the end of 2006 while stationed in South Carolina. A series of negative things kept happening in my life and consequently South Carolina became my arch nemesis. I truly wonder why I chose such an isolated place away from all the people & things I loved.

When I finally finished my 9yrs of military service I was left with the decision to leave or stay. Honestly, I wanted to run as far away from here as I could but I was hurting. I needed a fresh start but I didn't believe this would be the place of my new beginnings. However, God's plans for my life was greater than I could imagine.

So, the journey started as the walls came tumbling down brick by brick each layer exposed a deeper part of my pain. I was left naked with the pure ugliness of who I became over the last several years.

While I kicked and screamed my way through the journey I became tired of the misery. I was tired of the circle of insanity and often begged the Lord to let me leave South Carolina. I was angry; I wanted God to tell me why I was here. But I had no idea that all the misfortunes were just preparing me for my purpose. I was challenged to romance the stones in my life and change them into diamonds.

It's funny; as much as I wanted to leave God used this place of transition as a place for me to become whole. Whatever, I thought I was looking for found me. And as I continue to heal I am feeling more alive everyday embracing the passion that sets my soul on fire!

Romancing The Stone of Your Life

It was obvious I was lost in translation on this path of finding my purpose. I spent years trying to search for what fulfilled my soul but I was clueless. I needed something to reignite my fire. What was I missing? Uhm....it dawned on me, I was missing passion.

If I could retrace my steps, I lost my passion at the end of 2006 while stationed in South Carolina. A series of negative things kept happening in my life and consequently South Carolina became my arch nemesis. I truly wonder why I chose such an isolated place away from all the people & things I loved.

When I finally finished my 9yrs of military service I was left with the decision to leave or stay. Honestly, I wanted to run as far away from here as I could but I was hurting. I needed a fresh start but I didn't believe this would be the place of my new beginnings. However, God's plans for my life was greater than I could imagine.

So, the journey started as the walls came tumbling down brick by brick each layer exposed a deeper part of my pain. I was left naked with the pure ugliness of who I became over the last several years.

While I kicked and screamed my way through the journey I became tired of the misery. I was tired of the circle of insanity and often begged the Lord to let me leave South Carolina. I was angry; I wanted God to tell me why I was here. But I had no idea that all the misfortunes were just preparing me for my purpose. I was challenged to romance the stones in my life and change them into diamonds.

It's funny; as much as I wanted to leave God used this place of transition as a place for me to become whole. Whatever, I thought I was looking for found me. And as I continue to heal I am feeling more alive everyday embracing the passion that sets my soul on fire!

Recap of December Blog Post!

I can't believe we are in our last week in 2015 & the New Year is quickly approaching. As we say goodbye to 2015 below are the provided links to recap our series for December: Me, Myself & I! 

Me: The Re-Emergence:
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/me-re-emegerence.html

Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup!
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/self-care-plan-fill-your-cup-part-1.html

The Moment I Fell back In Love With Life!
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/the-moment-i-fell-back-in-love-with-life.html

Recap of December Blog Post!

I can't believe we are in our last week in 2015 & the New Year is quickly approaching. As we say goodbye to 2015 below are the provided links to recap our series for December: Me, Myself & I! 

Me: The Re-Emergence:
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/me-re-emegerence.html

Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup!
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/self-care-plan-fill-your-cup-part-1.html

The Moment I Fell back In Love With Life!
http://www.theinspirationalcorner.net/2015/12/the-moment-i-fell-back-in-love-with-life.html

Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup

Today, I made a serious commitment to sit down and start my self-care plan. I did the needed research to find the pieces to solidify my self-care goals. When you begin to think about self-care you have to take inventory of all the things that create your own humanity. So, as I began to research  I realized I needed to categorized every aspect of my self-care. 

Your self-care plan can be divided into 6-8 categories such as mental, emotional, physical/wellness, beauty, social/relational (relationships of love & friendship), spiritual, financial and recreational.  Once you begin to create each category then it is time to focus on each specific area. 

Before, I decided to start my self-care journey I wrote a rough draft of each area and my focal points. Self-care is about you filling every empty corner in your mind, body and soul. As I embark on this journey I am excited to take a year or more to focus on what I need so I can no longer have lack in my life. Many times in society we are programmed to believe that taking care of yourself is a selfish act. However, taking care of yourself is the most important act of your life.

I use to feel guilty about doing stuff for myself until I realized other people had no problem with taking from me. I would give and give until I couldn't give anymore. This became an issue because I was depleting myself. I consistently gave my all to other people which is never a good concept. When you fall into the deception of giving your all then you are allowing yourself to lack. Lack is connected to scarcity and poverty. Abundance is the opposite of this system.

In order to generate abundance you have to fill yourself up until you are overflowing in all areas of your life. Refueling your mind, body and soul is an important criteria in order to be able to help others. Giving back to others first starts with you filling your cup each day. When you can ask yourself "what do I need?"  then you can help someone else because your need is met.

In a world full of humanity we subtract ourselves from the humane part. I do believe if you give to others the Lord will bless you but I also believe in the concept of using wisdom on how to give and the measure to give.

Understand if you never fill your cup or become the first partaker everyone else including yourself will starve. I am tired of starving and being broke so I decided to fill my cup & then in return I can fill everyone else cup around me!  

Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup

Today, I made a serious commitment to sit down and start my self-care plan. I did the needed research to find the pieces to solidify my self-care goals. When you begin to think about self-care you have to take inventory of all the things that create your own humanity. So, as I began to research  I realized I needed to categorized every aspect of my self-care. 

Your self-care plan can be divided into 6-8 categories such as mental, emotional, physical/wellness, beauty, social/relational (relationships of love & friendship), spiritual, financial and recreational.  Once you begin to create each category then it is time to focus on each specific area. 

Before, I decided to start my self-care journey I wrote a rough draft of each area and my focal points. Self-care is about you filling every empty corner in your mind, body and soul. As I embark on this journey I am excited to take a year or more to focus on what I need so I can no longer have lack in my life. Many times in society we are programmed to believe that taking care of yourself is a selfish act. However, taking care of yourself is the most important act of your life.

I use to feel guilty about doing stuff for myself until I realized other people had no problem with taking from me. I would give and give until I couldn't give anymore. This became an issue because I was depleting myself. I consistently gave my all to other people which is never a good concept. When you fall into the deception of giving your all then you are allowing yourself to lack. Lack is connected to scarcity and poverty. Abundance is the opposite of this system.

In order to generate abundance you have to fill yourself up until you are overflowing in all areas of your life. Refueling your mind, body and soul is an important criteria in order to be able to help others. Giving back to others first starts with you filling your cup each day. When you can ask yourself "what do I need?"  then you can help someone else because your need is met.

In a world full of humanity we subtract ourselves from the humane part. I do believe if you give to others the Lord will bless you but I also believe in the concept of using wisdom on how to give and the measure to give.

Understand if you never fill your cup or become the first partaker everyone else including yourself will starve. I am tired of starving and being broke so I decided to fill my cup & then in return I can fill everyone else cup around me!  

The One Day That Changed My Life: My Rebirth!

 

"I dance, I smile & live fearlessly because I know what it feels like to die on the inside I only want to live authentically being me." ~Stylicia~

I believe it is a crime to never acknowledge your greatness and never share it with the world. I use to be the kind of girl that was scared to shout on the rooftop about my accomplishments until I realize someone else needs my inspiration, testimonies and story. I love life and live it abundantly because in my life I had too many tragedies impact me especially on February 20, 2007 when my two year old daughter left this world. My children are my joy and to lose a child is like a stab in the heart; painful and sometimes you wonder is recovery possible. After my oldest daughter and I had to endure the pain of losing my sweet two year old daughter, Serenity T. Bowden we somehow had to pick up the pieces. The hardest part in my life was picking up the pieces acting as if life goes on but for me it stopped and nothing remained the same. I was no longer the person everyone wanted me to be but I was bitter, angry and hurt. However, with my strong faith in the Lord he utilized this pain to turn it into a purpose bigger than me. I was a writer since I was eight years old but my gift, passion came full circle when I got stationed in South Carolina five years ago when I was still in the U.S. Navy. The tragedy of losing an angel gave me the courage to share my pain through the written word. I expressed my pain, triumphs and healing through the gift of words which became my source of healing. Every time I released the pen it reminded me of my dreams and sharing them with my family when I was young speaking of being a great famous writer. After exiting the military in 2008 I was broken with open wounds still needing some repair. I had a void but nothing to fill it but my will to write and overcome the pain. In 2011, a four year relationship ended with a man I fell in love with but little did I know it was the beginning of finding my authentic self. I took two years to face the real me by coping with internal issues and stopping the insanity in my life. Some chains needed to be broken but others around me realized I was changing no longer being the people pleaser and control freak. I lost some friendships in the process but I can truly say I am so glad I stayed true to myself, walking boldly in my truth. Today, I live bold, loud and authentically without societal validation celebrating who I am. This moment that happen six years ago changed the way I view and live life. My youngest daughter time on this Earth affected so many people. My oldest daughter and I keep Serenity's memory alive by not taking life for granted. I always have to live with the pain of losing a child but I have a choice to let this pain stop me or motivate me to keep going to share my gift with the world. I choose to let this pain fuel me to share my gift and passion to inspire humanity. My plate is large but God has given me all the tools I need to motivate & inspire those that are put in my path. So, I continue to release the pen so healing can begin.....This was the result of the rebirth of me!

The One Day That Changed My Life: My Rebirth!

 

"I dance, I smile & live fearlessly because I know what it feels like to die on the inside I only want to live authentically being me." ~Stylicia~

I believe it is a crime to never acknowledge your greatness and never share it with the world. I use to be the kind of girl that was scared to shout on the rooftop about my accomplishments until I realize someone else needs my inspiration, testimonies and story. I love life and live it abundantly because in my life I had too many tragedies impact me especially on February 20, 2007 when my two year old daughter left this world. My children are my joy and to lose a child is like a stab in the heart; painful and sometimes you wonder is recovery possible. After my oldest daughter and I had to endure the pain of losing my sweet two year old daughter, Serenity T. Bowden we somehow had to pick up the pieces. The hardest part in my life was picking up the pieces acting as if life goes on but for me it stopped and nothing remained the same. I was no longer the person everyone wanted me to be but I was bitter, angry and hurt. However, with my strong faith in the Lord he utilized this pain to turn it into a purpose bigger than me. I was a writer since I was eight years old but my gift, passion came full circle when I got stationed in South Carolina five years ago when I was still in the U.S. Navy. The tragedy of losing an angel gave me the courage to share my pain through the written word. I expressed my pain, triumphs and healing through the gift of words which became my source of healing. Every time I released the pen it reminded me of my dreams and sharing them with my family when I was young speaking of being a great famous writer. After exiting the military in 2008 I was broken with open wounds still needing some repair. I had a void but nothing to fill it but my will to write and overcome the pain. In 2011, a four year relationship ended with a man I fell in love with but little did I know it was the beginning of finding my authentic self. I took two years to face the real me by coping with internal issues and stopping the insanity in my life. Some chains needed to be broken but others around me realized I was changing no longer being the people pleaser and control freak. I lost some friendships in the process but I can truly say I am so glad I stayed true to myself, walking boldly in my truth. Today, I live bold, loud and authentically without societal validation celebrating who I am. This moment that happen six years ago changed the way I view and live life. My youngest daughter time on this Earth affected so many people. My oldest daughter and I keep Serenity's memory alive by not taking life for granted. I always have to live with the pain of losing a child but I have a choice to let this pain stop me or motivate me to keep going to share my gift with the world. I choose to let this pain fuel me to share my gift and passion to inspire humanity. My plate is large but God has given me all the tools I need to motivate & inspire those that are put in my path. So, I continue to release the pen so healing can begin.....This was the result of the rebirth of me!

Slow Down, Face The Pain & Heal!

When life consumes you & you find yourself on full speed ahead take a step back and slow down. ~Stylicia~

 

 

I never thought it would be this challenging to slow down and not travel for a month. I can truly say I have been challenged in this area because I am usually on the road where the wind is hitting my hair and my eyes are wide open for a new adventure. However, this month I have found myself stationary and listening to my own thoughts as they play on repeat. In this time of seclusion I had to face some internal issues and realize it does not feel so good. Sometimes when we are always running around, hiding and dodging our real thoughts we can never deal with the real issues. I realize living here in SC has been challenging for me mentally and emotionally because it is very slow and country but God has used this place to make me face myself. I understand that healing can never take place if I am always running and never slowing down to hear my thoughts. This particular moment in my life has taught me to be real with myself and face areas of my life where the pain still remains. I have realized there lies some internal issues that I have to confront and start working towards a resolution in order to start the healing process. If I am always around noise I can never hear the quiet voice on the inside of me. When you are always busy that does not accumulate to you being productive. Sometimes we stay busy to stop thinking about how hurt we are, how lonely we are or how much we need help. This month has been a time where God has challenged me to deal with issues and heal. Authenticity has everything to do with you being true to yourself and sometimes this can be the hardest thing to do. In my authentic journey I am faced with real issues that sometimes have been buried by my own disillusion. I told myself in 2013 I refuse to lie to myself in order for me heal. If we never slow down to face what lies on the surface of our souls we can never truly be free. Freedom comes when we make a decision that life is about being better not bitter and not allowing the residue of pain to sit. Once I made a decision to submit to slowing down and face the music I realize my healing is starting in areas that I never thought were still in pain. I challenge you today to slow down, face the music and hear your soul so you can heal. If you are always so busy and consumed you can never really listen to the voice that is trying to get your attention. In order to be healthy in your life you have to be willing to...Slow Down..Face The Pain...And Heal!

 

Slow Down, Face The Pain & Heal!

When life consumes you & you find yourself on full speed ahead take a step back and slow down. ~Stylicia~

 

 

I never thought it would be this challenging to slow down and not travel for a month. I can truly say I have been challenged in this area because I am usually on the road where the wind is hitting my hair and my eyes are wide open for a new adventure. However, this month I have found myself stationary and listening to my own thoughts as they play on repeat. In this time of seclusion I had to face some internal issues and realize it does not feel so good. Sometimes when we are always running around, hiding and dodging our real thoughts we can never deal with the real issues. I realize living here in SC has been challenging for me mentally and emotionally because it is very slow and country but God has used this place to make me face myself. I understand that healing can never take place if I am always running and never slowing down to hear my thoughts. This particular moment in my life has taught me to be real with myself and face areas of my life where the pain still remains. I have realized there lies some internal issues that I have to confront and start working towards a resolution in order to start the healing process. If I am always around noise I can never hear the quiet voice on the inside of me. When you are always busy that does not accumulate to you being productive. Sometimes we stay busy to stop thinking about how hurt we are, how lonely we are or how much we need help. This month has been a time where God has challenged me to deal with issues and heal. Authenticity has everything to do with you being true to yourself and sometimes this can be the hardest thing to do. In my authentic journey I am faced with real issues that sometimes have been buried by my own disillusion. I told myself in 2013 I refuse to lie to myself in order for me heal. If we never slow down to face what lies on the surface of our souls we can never truly be free. Freedom comes when we make a decision that life is about being better not bitter and not allowing the residue of pain to sit. Once I made a decision to submit to slowing down and face the music I realize my healing is starting in areas that I never thought were still in pain. I challenge you today to slow down, face the music and hear your soul so you can heal. If you are always so busy and consumed you can never really listen to the voice that is trying to get your attention. In order to be healthy in your life you have to be willing to...Slow Down..Face The Pain...And Heal!

 

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!

Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!

Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

Data Dump:Mental Detox 101 (10 Lessons Learned)

I think therefore I am. ~Rene Descartes~

Recently I decided to do a 10 day mental detox, I had no idea how the journey would go but I knew my end result would be self fulfilling and rewarding. I planned to be in total solitary confinement with no music, only business related phone conversations, no TV, no social media, prayer, meditation & reading positive or inspirational literature. I learned alot about the power of self-love, self-appreciation, dumping out the negative things in my mental thought process, speaking affirmations over my life and being unapologetic about loving myself unconditionally. Below are 10 important lessons I learned about myself and about my mental capacity.

Here are 10 lessons from my mental detox 101:

1)   Dump The Data. The first day I spent time writing down all my self defeating thoughts. So I begin to pour those negative thoughts, concepts and ideas on paper. I purge myself of all the negative things I thought about my future, my goals and about myself.

2) Refresh. I decide to let the negative thoughts go the second day and I hit refresh on my brain. It was time for my computerized mentality to have a blank motherboard. It was time for new data, installing new R.A.M (Random Access To New Memory).

3) Power of Appreciation.  I realized how much I was starving the appreciation I needed to have for myself. I was constantly waiting for friends and insignificant people to appreciate me but I realize I needed to appreciate myself first. It made me realize how special my gift, talent, skill is to the world and I should not give it away for free. It helped me understand to do special things for myself by myself. Those special events & places I deserve to be the first person to experience them alone (my own personal joys). 

4) Power of Investment. If I don't invest in my greatness how can I attract sowers to sow into my greatness. I am committed to always investing in myself for self improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. No more limitations!

5) Self Love Movement: Self love is a powerful love. Until love is oozing from my pores, this self love journey will never end. Loving myself unconditionally unapologetically! 

6) Purify Me. Stop entertaining negative, toxic things that will easily imprint into my brain. I have to stay mentally clean!

7) Hit Delete. Some mental disruptions are insignificant to  put your  focus on, so weed out the weeds killing your seeds of growth.

8) Let It Flow. Surrounded by so much positivity helped me attract other positive forces like a magnet. When you are mentally positive, positive words flow easily. 

9) Be Fearless. There is no more room for fear I was reminded how being fearless is apart of my physical makeup. I lived in different countries by myself while stationed in the military where fear was never apart of life. I realized how being comfortable is boring, its time to live life on edge again. Adrenaline Rush!

10) Shaking It Up. Shaking up your world with "new" things provokes a change in your mind. It opens your mind to new exciting things. It will help your creativity flow. 

P.S. My mental detox is something I can not afford to do but it is something I committed to do for every month. The first three days of every month I will be in solitary mental confinement. 

So, now I challenge you to take time to do your own Data Dump!

Data Dump:Mental Detox 101 (10 Lessons Learned)

I think therefore I am. ~Rene Descartes~

Recently I decided to do a 10 day mental detox, I had no idea how the journey would go but I knew my end result would be self fulfilling and rewarding. I planned to be in total solitary confinement with no music, only business related phone conversations, no TV, no social media, prayer, meditation & reading positive or inspirational literature. I learned alot about the power of self-love, self-appreciation, dumping out the negative things in my mental thought process, speaking affirmations over my life and being unapologetic about loving myself unconditionally. Below are 10 important lessons I learned about myself and about my mental capacity.

Here are 10 lessons from my mental detox 101:

1)   Dump The Data. The first day I spent time writing down all my self defeating thoughts. So I begin to pour those negative thoughts, concepts and ideas on paper. I purge myself of all the negative things I thought about my future, my goals and about myself.

2) Refresh. I decide to let the negative thoughts go the second day and I hit refresh on my brain. It was time for my computerized mentality to have a blank motherboard. It was time for new data, installing new R.A.M (Random Access To New Memory).

3) Power of Appreciation.  I realized how much I was starving the appreciation I needed to have for myself. I was constantly waiting for friends and insignificant people to appreciate me but I realize I needed to appreciate myself first. It made me realize how special my gift, talent, skill is to the world and I should not give it away for free. It helped me understand to do special things for myself by myself. Those special events & places I deserve to be the first person to experience them alone (my own personal joys). 

4) Power of Investment. If I don't invest in my greatness how can I attract sowers to sow into my greatness. I am committed to always investing in myself for self improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. No more limitations!

5) Self Love Movement: Self love is a powerful love. Until love is oozing from my pores, this self love journey will never end. Loving myself unconditionally unapologetically! 

6) Purify Me. Stop entertaining negative, toxic things that will easily imprint into my brain. I have to stay mentally clean!

7) Hit Delete. Some mental disruptions are insignificant to  put your  focus on, so weed out the weeds killing your seeds of growth.

8) Let It Flow. Surrounded by so much positivity helped me attract other positive forces like a magnet. When you are mentally positive, positive words flow easily. 

9) Be Fearless. There is no more room for fear I was reminded how being fearless is apart of my physical makeup. I lived in different countries by myself while stationed in the military where fear was never apart of life. I realized how being comfortable is boring, its time to live life on edge again. Adrenaline Rush!

10) Shaking It Up. Shaking up your world with "new" things provokes a change in your mind. It opens your mind to new exciting things. It will help your creativity flow. 

P.S. My mental detox is something I can not afford to do but it is something I committed to do for every month. The first three days of every month I will be in solitary mental confinement. 

So, now I challenge you to take time to do your own Data Dump!

The Power In Loving Yourself

If there is power in loving yourself then why are people doing less of it....

There is a great power in loving yourself from the crown of your head to the sole of your feet. I use to lack this gift of love because I did not believe in putting myself first. I was so use to putting everyone needs before my needs and it drained me. Once I started to love myself unconditionally I felt a sense of self worth. For so long I put my self-worth in people and my identity was stuck in the men I dated and my friends. I had an identity problem which affected my life in a great way. However, when I began to love myself my circle of friends changed and my relationship with men changed as well. I decided to love myself, started to become my own best friend and soon my road became an individual path. The road to self love can sometimes be a lonely road but you have to decide that  loving yourself is worth losing some people. I had the devastating blow of a 14 year  friendship ending over my new found self love. Do I regret the choice? No, I never regret putting my love for myself first. People will  dump all their emotional and mental trash on you as long as you allow them to do it. The road maybe lonesome but becoming your own best friend is optional. It taught me how to dig deep within to give myself what I  needed. Everything we need is planted on the inside of us, but we become busy looking for love, peace, joy, etc. in other people. God has equipped us with all the significant tools to live an abundant life. Whatever we are lacking all we have to do is seek within ourselves to pull out our full potential. Once I began to nurture my love for myself I found my joy, peace, laughter and friendship in myself. I am no longer looking for friendship because I am learning to be my own best friend. I am no longer looking for peace, love or joy because I am discovering it within myself. The journey is endless and the process is continuous to finding  the solutions inside of me yet it is the most rewarding path I have taken....There is a great rewarding power in loving yourself!

P.S. I am unapologetic for choosing me...Never apologize for loving yourself!