Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup

Today, I made a serious commitment to sit down and start my self-care plan. I did the needed research to find the pieces to solidify my self-care goals. When you begin to think about self-care you have to take inventory of all the things that create your own humanity. So, as I began to research  I realized I needed to categorized every aspect of my self-care. 

Your self-care plan can be divided into 6-8 categories such as mental, emotional, physical/wellness, beauty, social/relational (relationships of love & friendship), spiritual, financial and recreational.  Once you begin to create each category then it is time to focus on each specific area. 

Before, I decided to start my self-care journey I wrote a rough draft of each area and my focal points. Self-care is about you filling every empty corner in your mind, body and soul. As I embark on this journey I am excited to take a year or more to focus on what I need so I can no longer have lack in my life. Many times in society we are programmed to believe that taking care of yourself is a selfish act. However, taking care of yourself is the most important act of your life.

I use to feel guilty about doing stuff for myself until I realized other people had no problem with taking from me. I would give and give until I couldn't give anymore. This became an issue because I was depleting myself. I consistently gave my all to other people which is never a good concept. When you fall into the deception of giving your all then you are allowing yourself to lack. Lack is connected to scarcity and poverty. Abundance is the opposite of this system.

In order to generate abundance you have to fill yourself up until you are overflowing in all areas of your life. Refueling your mind, body and soul is an important criteria in order to be able to help others. Giving back to others first starts with you filling your cup each day. When you can ask yourself "what do I need?"  then you can help someone else because your need is met.

In a world full of humanity we subtract ourselves from the humane part. I do believe if you give to others the Lord will bless you but I also believe in the concept of using wisdom on how to give and the measure to give.

Understand if you never fill your cup or become the first partaker everyone else including yourself will starve. I am tired of starving and being broke so I decided to fill my cup & then in return I can fill everyone else cup around me!  

Self Care Plan: Fill Your Cup

Today, I made a serious commitment to sit down and start my self-care plan. I did the needed research to find the pieces to solidify my self-care goals. When you begin to think about self-care you have to take inventory of all the things that create your own humanity. So, as I began to research  I realized I needed to categorized every aspect of my self-care. 

Your self-care plan can be divided into 6-8 categories such as mental, emotional, physical/wellness, beauty, social/relational (relationships of love & friendship), spiritual, financial and recreational.  Once you begin to create each category then it is time to focus on each specific area. 

Before, I decided to start my self-care journey I wrote a rough draft of each area and my focal points. Self-care is about you filling every empty corner in your mind, body and soul. As I embark on this journey I am excited to take a year or more to focus on what I need so I can no longer have lack in my life. Many times in society we are programmed to believe that taking care of yourself is a selfish act. However, taking care of yourself is the most important act of your life.

I use to feel guilty about doing stuff for myself until I realized other people had no problem with taking from me. I would give and give until I couldn't give anymore. This became an issue because I was depleting myself. I consistently gave my all to other people which is never a good concept. When you fall into the deception of giving your all then you are allowing yourself to lack. Lack is connected to scarcity and poverty. Abundance is the opposite of this system.

In order to generate abundance you have to fill yourself up until you are overflowing in all areas of your life. Refueling your mind, body and soul is an important criteria in order to be able to help others. Giving back to others first starts with you filling your cup each day. When you can ask yourself "what do I need?"  then you can help someone else because your need is met.

In a world full of humanity we subtract ourselves from the humane part. I do believe if you give to others the Lord will bless you but I also believe in the concept of using wisdom on how to give and the measure to give.

Understand if you never fill your cup or become the first partaker everyone else including yourself will starve. I am tired of starving and being broke so I decided to fill my cup & then in return I can fill everyone else cup around me!  

Commit To Yourself

As women we are always prone to help everyone else but we lack in the area of supporting ourselves. We constantly become everything to everyone while our needs, desires and wants shrink in the background. It is important that we reevaluate our priorities and spend the time to recommit back to ourselves. Several years ago I was plagued with the syndrome of people pleasing. I would always assist others in their needs, business projects, problems etc. however, as my light was becoming dimmer I never took the time to fill up. I found myself on E, burnt out and filled with resentment towards people who used me. But I realized it was not their fault because I allowed it. From that point on in my life I began to let go of the leeches, manipulators, users and takers in my life. I made a vow to myself that I was going to become a top priority in my own life. 

If the above scenario sounds quite familiar to you then it is time to make drastic changes in your life. When you do not take the time to commit to yourself to create happiness in your life then you begin to expect others to supply your happiness. The biggest thing I have learned in my life is it's no ones responsibility to make you happy. Your happiness should always come from within.

If you think about the word commit it literally means to execute or devote. Devoting time to yourself everyday should be an important task for you. During my journey of learning to commit back to my needs, desires & happiness I began to create a yearly contract with myself. In the contract I listed the areas that were lacking & created goals to commit myself back to creating a  better life in those areas.

 You have to find the strength within yourself everyday to make sure you are the top priority in your life. If you are never finding the time to commit or devote time to yourself then your light will die out. The best solution to start the process of committing to yourself is creating boundaries with people. When you set boundaries with those around you it gives you the freedom to take care of you.

Never neglect yourself in the process of being there for others because in actuality you need yourself more than they do. You Matter! 

Commit To Yourself

As women we are always prone to help everyone else but we lack in the area of supporting ourselves. We constantly become everything to everyone while our needs, desires and wants shrink in the background. It is important that we reevaluate our priorities and spend the time to recommit back to ourselves. Several years ago I was plagued with the syndrome of people pleasing. I would always assist others in their needs, business projects, problems etc. however, as my light was becoming dimmer I never took the time to fill up. I found myself on E, burnt out and filled with resentment towards people who used me. But I realized it was not their fault because I allowed it. From that point on in my life I began to let go of the leeches, manipulators, users and takers in my life. I made a vow to myself that I was going to become a top priority in my own life. 

If the above scenario sounds quite familiar to you then it is time to make drastic changes in your life. When you do not take the time to commit to yourself to create happiness in your life then you begin to expect others to supply your happiness. The biggest thing I have learned in my life is it's no ones responsibility to make you happy. Your happiness should always come from within.

If you think about the word commit it literally means to execute or devote. Devoting time to yourself everyday should be an important task for you. During my journey of learning to commit back to my needs, desires & happiness I began to create a yearly contract with myself. In the contract I listed the areas that were lacking & created goals to commit myself back to creating a  better life in those areas.

 You have to find the strength within yourself everyday to make sure you are the top priority in your life. If you are never finding the time to commit or devote time to yourself then your light will die out. The best solution to start the process of committing to yourself is creating boundaries with people. When you set boundaries with those around you it gives you the freedom to take care of you.

Never neglect yourself in the process of being there for others because in actuality you need yourself more than they do. You Matter! 

Embrace Your Curves!

I realized today no matter how old I get every bump, stump, lump

On me I have to appreciate the perfect physical

Structure of me

 It doesn’t matter what people say

Everything about me is beautiful

And it’s okay

It doesn’t matter what I say every part of me

Is beautiful. ~Stylicia, (excerpt from the poem entitled "Beautiful")~

 

We all have heard of the colloquialism "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" which has meant different things to many people. This colloquialism has been a universal saying for years but yet we still have not gone deeper into the significance of this meaning. Beauty is a diverse subject that is translated through the way we dress, act and behave. No one can put a definite interpretation of what beauty is, not even the Webester Dictionary. For many years in my life I would struggle with my own personal insecurities about my body and it affected the way I viewed my own physical beauty. I believe we all have personal insecurities with the physical structure of our body. Many of us have complained, cried and hidden the parts of the body that made us feel inadequate.

 However, in my authentic journey (especially in this year) I am learning to face my physical insecurities. I have learned the greatest power of beauty is embracing who you are no matter how many physical deficiencies you may have at the time. Some people go to great lengths to get cosmetic surgery done to their body but I believe the work of being insecure has to start from within. The more I dig deeper into my authentic journey I have learn the beauty of getting to the root of my insecurities. When you begin to get to root of the problem you can see the light more clearly.

Last month, I decided I needed to face my physical insecurities about my body so I recommitted myself to the gym and I invested in a personal trainer. If we are not facing our insecurities then they will continue to haunt us and make us feel inadequate. The process has been a slow one but I realize I am the captain of my own physical health, I can sink or swim. I realized how important it is for me to stop making excuses of why my body is the way it is and find a solution to make it better. My personal goal is to invest in my body, soul and mind in order to be a happier person. I know this is another journey I have to partake in but it's worth it. I understand when I cheat on myself I hurt no one but myself. So today I am embracing my curves, realizing I am not 20 anymore and get my body in shape for where I am now. I cannot go backwards but only move forward.

So, the challenge for you on this day is to look in the mirror be raw and honest with yourself; stop complaining, whining and wondering why your body is not where it should be...It's time to deal with you insecurities and embrace your curves, work on your deficiencies so you can become more confident in who you are. The time is now to Embrace Your Curves!

Challenge: This month make a list of the body parts you want to work on and get serious about the work. Write up a contract of commitment to have a reminder of what you will commit yourself to for this month.

Embrace Your Curves!

I realized today no matter how old I get every bump, stump, lump

On me I have to appreciate the perfect physical

Structure of me

 It doesn’t matter what people say

Everything about me is beautiful

And it’s okay

It doesn’t matter what I say every part of me

Is beautiful. ~Stylicia, (excerpt from the poem entitled "Beautiful")~

 

We all have heard of the colloquialism "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" which has meant different things to many people. This colloquialism has been a universal saying for years but yet we still have not gone deeper into the significance of this meaning. Beauty is a diverse subject that is translated through the way we dress, act and behave. No one can put a definite interpretation of what beauty is, not even the Webester Dictionary. For many years in my life I would struggle with my own personal insecurities about my body and it affected the way I viewed my own physical beauty. I believe we all have personal insecurities with the physical structure of our body. Many of us have complained, cried and hidden the parts of the body that made us feel inadequate.

 However, in my authentic journey (especially in this year) I am learning to face my physical insecurities. I have learned the greatest power of beauty is embracing who you are no matter how many physical deficiencies you may have at the time. Some people go to great lengths to get cosmetic surgery done to their body but I believe the work of being insecure has to start from within. The more I dig deeper into my authentic journey I have learn the beauty of getting to the root of my insecurities. When you begin to get to root of the problem you can see the light more clearly.

Last month, I decided I needed to face my physical insecurities about my body so I recommitted myself to the gym and I invested in a personal trainer. If we are not facing our insecurities then they will continue to haunt us and make us feel inadequate. The process has been a slow one but I realize I am the captain of my own physical health, I can sink or swim. I realized how important it is for me to stop making excuses of why my body is the way it is and find a solution to make it better. My personal goal is to invest in my body, soul and mind in order to be a happier person. I know this is another journey I have to partake in but it's worth it. I understand when I cheat on myself I hurt no one but myself. So today I am embracing my curves, realizing I am not 20 anymore and get my body in shape for where I am now. I cannot go backwards but only move forward.

So, the challenge for you on this day is to look in the mirror be raw and honest with yourself; stop complaining, whining and wondering why your body is not where it should be...It's time to deal with you insecurities and embrace your curves, work on your deficiencies so you can become more confident in who you are. The time is now to Embrace Your Curves!

Challenge: This month make a list of the body parts you want to work on and get serious about the work. Write up a contract of commitment to have a reminder of what you will commit yourself to for this month.

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!

Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!

Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

Data Dump:Mental Detox 101 (10 Lessons Learned)

I think therefore I am. ~Rene Descartes~

Recently I decided to do a 10 day mental detox, I had no idea how the journey would go but I knew my end result would be self fulfilling and rewarding. I planned to be in total solitary confinement with no music, only business related phone conversations, no TV, no social media, prayer, meditation & reading positive or inspirational literature. I learned alot about the power of self-love, self-appreciation, dumping out the negative things in my mental thought process, speaking affirmations over my life and being unapologetic about loving myself unconditionally. Below are 10 important lessons I learned about myself and about my mental capacity.

Here are 10 lessons from my mental detox 101:

1)   Dump The Data. The first day I spent time writing down all my self defeating thoughts. So I begin to pour those negative thoughts, concepts and ideas on paper. I purge myself of all the negative things I thought about my future, my goals and about myself.

2) Refresh. I decide to let the negative thoughts go the second day and I hit refresh on my brain. It was time for my computerized mentality to have a blank motherboard. It was time for new data, installing new R.A.M (Random Access To New Memory).

3) Power of Appreciation.  I realized how much I was starving the appreciation I needed to have for myself. I was constantly waiting for friends and insignificant people to appreciate me but I realize I needed to appreciate myself first. It made me realize how special my gift, talent, skill is to the world and I should not give it away for free. It helped me understand to do special things for myself by myself. Those special events & places I deserve to be the first person to experience them alone (my own personal joys). 

4) Power of Investment. If I don't invest in my greatness how can I attract sowers to sow into my greatness. I am committed to always investing in myself for self improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. No more limitations!

5) Self Love Movement: Self love is a powerful love. Until love is oozing from my pores, this self love journey will never end. Loving myself unconditionally unapologetically! 

6) Purify Me. Stop entertaining negative, toxic things that will easily imprint into my brain. I have to stay mentally clean!

7) Hit Delete. Some mental disruptions are insignificant to  put your  focus on, so weed out the weeds killing your seeds of growth.

8) Let It Flow. Surrounded by so much positivity helped me attract other positive forces like a magnet. When you are mentally positive, positive words flow easily. 

9) Be Fearless. There is no more room for fear I was reminded how being fearless is apart of my physical makeup. I lived in different countries by myself while stationed in the military where fear was never apart of life. I realized how being comfortable is boring, its time to live life on edge again. Adrenaline Rush!

10) Shaking It Up. Shaking up your world with "new" things provokes a change in your mind. It opens your mind to new exciting things. It will help your creativity flow. 

P.S. My mental detox is something I can not afford to do but it is something I committed to do for every month. The first three days of every month I will be in solitary mental confinement. 

So, now I challenge you to take time to do your own Data Dump!

Data Dump:Mental Detox 101 (10 Lessons Learned)

I think therefore I am. ~Rene Descartes~

Recently I decided to do a 10 day mental detox, I had no idea how the journey would go but I knew my end result would be self fulfilling and rewarding. I planned to be in total solitary confinement with no music, only business related phone conversations, no TV, no social media, prayer, meditation & reading positive or inspirational literature. I learned alot about the power of self-love, self-appreciation, dumping out the negative things in my mental thought process, speaking affirmations over my life and being unapologetic about loving myself unconditionally. Below are 10 important lessons I learned about myself and about my mental capacity.

Here are 10 lessons from my mental detox 101:

1)   Dump The Data. The first day I spent time writing down all my self defeating thoughts. So I begin to pour those negative thoughts, concepts and ideas on paper. I purge myself of all the negative things I thought about my future, my goals and about myself.

2) Refresh. I decide to let the negative thoughts go the second day and I hit refresh on my brain. It was time for my computerized mentality to have a blank motherboard. It was time for new data, installing new R.A.M (Random Access To New Memory).

3) Power of Appreciation.  I realized how much I was starving the appreciation I needed to have for myself. I was constantly waiting for friends and insignificant people to appreciate me but I realize I needed to appreciate myself first. It made me realize how special my gift, talent, skill is to the world and I should not give it away for free. It helped me understand to do special things for myself by myself. Those special events & places I deserve to be the first person to experience them alone (my own personal joys). 

4) Power of Investment. If I don't invest in my greatness how can I attract sowers to sow into my greatness. I am committed to always investing in myself for self improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. No more limitations!

5) Self Love Movement: Self love is a powerful love. Until love is oozing from my pores, this self love journey will never end. Loving myself unconditionally unapologetically! 

6) Purify Me. Stop entertaining negative, toxic things that will easily imprint into my brain. I have to stay mentally clean!

7) Hit Delete. Some mental disruptions are insignificant to  put your  focus on, so weed out the weeds killing your seeds of growth.

8) Let It Flow. Surrounded by so much positivity helped me attract other positive forces like a magnet. When you are mentally positive, positive words flow easily. 

9) Be Fearless. There is no more room for fear I was reminded how being fearless is apart of my physical makeup. I lived in different countries by myself while stationed in the military where fear was never apart of life. I realized how being comfortable is boring, its time to live life on edge again. Adrenaline Rush!

10) Shaking It Up. Shaking up your world with "new" things provokes a change in your mind. It opens your mind to new exciting things. It will help your creativity flow. 

P.S. My mental detox is something I can not afford to do but it is something I committed to do for every month. The first three days of every month I will be in solitary mental confinement. 

So, now I challenge you to take time to do your own Data Dump!