12 Months of Beautification

 

After reading Esther 2:12 I decided to do 12 months of beautification starting this January 1st-December 31st, 2012. This will pertain to understanding why it is important to embrace my womanhood, enjoy being a woman and nurture my femininity everyday. In Esther 2:12 the maidens pamper themselves for twelve months 6 months with oil of myrrh and 6 months with perfumes and cosmetics. I believe that when a woman get to know her self inside as well as outside then she will not allow anyone to treat her below her worth. Many women do not know their worth because they do not take the time to get to know who they are, what they want and what makes them happy. They constantly become who other people want them to be instead of who they truly are within. I decided in 2011 to get to know myself and be true to myself. When you make a choice to be authentic sometimes this may mean the people in your life will change. People who are intimidated by who you are will eventually rotate to the background of your life. It is important to be a thermostat not a thermometer. You should always be the lady setting the temperature and shifting the atmosphere. If you are ready take this 12 month journey with me then first print out the following schedule below:

12 Months of Beautification

• January - Beauty is only skin deep... Take this month to take care of your skin. Get your massage, facial and spa treatment appointments schedule for this month.
• February-Love Is...Do something special for yourself for the next 28 days. Take some time to rest. All women need their beauty rest.
• March - Get Well...Spend this month making some goals for your physical health and make changes in your eating habits. Join Weight Watchers or get a trainer or join a gym or even buy those fitness DVDs for Pilate's, Nintendo wii fitness, zumba etc.
• April- Spring into a new you...Take this month to focus on your emotional state and mental health. If you need someone to talk to schedule an appointment with a close friend, therapist, counselor or spiritual leader in your church. Give yourself time to slow down and put your emotions into perspective.
• May- Time to reconnect....plan a girlfriend's weekend no kids allowed! To build effective relationships and mutually beneficial relationships you have to connect with positive people who will keep you motivated in your goals.
• June- Vacation, Vacation, Vacation...Take time away from the hustle and bustle of your business or job every woman deserves a little R&R! This month is strictly for you so vacation alone and get some clarity for the next 6 months ahead. This will be your personal retreat.
• July- Fashion is your best friend...Find out what clothes really scream your personality. This month get to know the fashionista on the inside of you. Also reacquaint yourself with makeup tips. (A little makeup will not hurt you.)
• August- Spiritual Connection...Take this month to create and build a more intimate relationship with the Lord. Understand where you are spiritually and then reevaluate where you want to be with the Lord. Also remember the relationship you have with God is between you and Him only. Meditate on this quote for the month:

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”― Mother Teresa

• September - Try Something New..Think of one thing you would like to do that you have not done. Think about how this activity will add to your productivity and becoming well rounded. After you do that then it is time to actually step out the boat and immerse yourself in the new activity.
• October- Financial Health..Reanalyze where you went wrong in this year and make financial goals to do better before the year is out. Also review how much you have saved and top the dollar amount next year.
• November- Holidays are vastly approaching and you are going to be doing alot of holiday shopping how about you make yourself top priority this year.
• December- The last month of the year, time to make a new vision board and reposition yourself to a successful new year. Begin to write your congratulations letter for the next year to come.

12 Months of Beautification

 

After reading Esther 2:12 I decided to do 12 months of beautification starting this January 1st-December 31st, 2012. This will pertain to understanding why it is important to embrace my womanhood, enjoy being a woman and nurture my femininity everyday. In Esther 2:12 the maidens pamper themselves for twelve months 6 months with oil of myrrh and 6 months with perfumes and cosmetics. I believe that when a woman get to know her self inside as well as outside then she will not allow anyone to treat her below her worth. Many women do not know their worth because they do not take the time to get to know who they are, what they want and what makes them happy. They constantly become who other people want them to be instead of who they truly are within. I decided in 2011 to get to know myself and be true to myself. When you make a choice to be authentic sometimes this may mean the people in your life will change. People who are intimidated by who you are will eventually rotate to the background of your life. It is important to be a thermostat not a thermometer. You should always be the lady setting the temperature and shifting the atmosphere. If you are ready take this 12 month journey with me then first print out the following schedule below:

12 Months of Beautification

• January - Beauty is only skin deep... Take this month to take care of your skin. Get your massage, facial and spa treatment appointments schedule for this month.
• February-Love Is...Do something special for yourself for the next 28 days. Take some time to rest. All women need their beauty rest.
• March - Get Well...Spend this month making some goals for your physical health and make changes in your eating habits. Join Weight Watchers or get a trainer or join a gym or even buy those fitness DVDs for Pilate's, Nintendo wii fitness, zumba etc.
• April- Spring into a new you...Take this month to focus on your emotional state and mental health. If you need someone to talk to schedule an appointment with a close friend, therapist, counselor or spiritual leader in your church. Give yourself time to slow down and put your emotions into perspective.
• May- Time to reconnect....plan a girlfriend's weekend no kids allowed! To build effective relationships and mutually beneficial relationships you have to connect with positive people who will keep you motivated in your goals.
• June- Vacation, Vacation, Vacation...Take time away from the hustle and bustle of your business or job every woman deserves a little R&R! This month is strictly for you so vacation alone and get some clarity for the next 6 months ahead. This will be your personal retreat.
• July- Fashion is your best friend...Find out what clothes really scream your personality. This month get to know the fashionista on the inside of you. Also reacquaint yourself with makeup tips. (A little makeup will not hurt you.)
• August- Spiritual Connection...Take this month to create and build a more intimate relationship with the Lord. Understand where you are spiritually and then reevaluate where you want to be with the Lord. Also remember the relationship you have with God is between you and Him only. Meditate on this quote for the month:

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”― Mother Teresa

• September - Try Something New..Think of one thing you would like to do that you have not done. Think about how this activity will add to your productivity and becoming well rounded. After you do that then it is time to actually step out the boat and immerse yourself in the new activity.
• October- Financial Health..Reanalyze where you went wrong in this year and make financial goals to do better before the year is out. Also review how much you have saved and top the dollar amount next year.
• November- Holidays are vastly approaching and you are going to be doing alot of holiday shopping how about you make yourself top priority this year.
• December- The last month of the year, time to make a new vision board and reposition yourself to a successful new year. Begin to write your congratulations letter for the next year to come.

Love Never Fails

As 2012 begins to take form and shine a light at the end of the tunnel reflections of things run through my head. The word "love" dances in my forethought and I am reminded of the power in this word. Many people have their own concept about love and sometimes confuse love with infatuation, abuse, sex, disrespect, pain etc. however love is not any of these things.  I looked for love in all the wrong places and faces hoping to find it in that one man. But love could not be found because I would mistake it for everything it was not at all. Today, I realize what love is and what defines the power of love. Love is patient,kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it does not anger easily, keeps no records of wrongs, does not delight in evil and overall it never fails. The lesson I learn today through self reflection is if a person never been loved like 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 you cannot expect them to love you at all. The first love is self-love and if a person cannot love themselves then understand they can never love you the way you deserve to be love. If you do not love yourself first you cannot give love or recieve love from anyone else. If you are looking for a man to give you love  before loving yourself then it is important you reevaluate the word "love". The best definition you can get from love is from the Bible, the word of God. The Lord teaches us that love never fails no matter what goes on in our life. If love can cover a multitude of sin then love is powerful. We should not abuse love, manipulate love or use it to string along other people. Love is a weapon not to be used lightly but to understand what it really stands for in the world. Never say it if you do not  mean it and do not use it to hurt others. Love is not confusion, not abuse, not anger, not disrespect, not lies, not hidden agendas but love is trust, hope, it perseveres, and most of all LOVE NEVER FAILS!    

Love Never Fails

As 2012 begins to take form and shine a light at the end of the tunnel reflections of things run through my head. The word "love" dances in my forethought and I am reminded of the power in this word. Many people have their own concept about love and sometimes confuse love with infatuation, abuse, sex, disrespect, pain etc. however love is not any of these things.  I looked for love in all the wrong places and faces hoping to find it in that one man. But love could not be found because I would mistake it for everything it was not at all. Today, I realize what love is and what defines the power of love. Love is patient,kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it does not anger easily, keeps no records of wrongs, does not delight in evil and overall it never fails. The lesson I learn today through self reflection is if a person never been loved like 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 you cannot expect them to love you at all. The first love is self-love and if a person cannot love themselves then understand they can never love you the way you deserve to be love. If you do not love yourself first you cannot give love or recieve love from anyone else. If you are looking for a man to give you love  before loving yourself then it is important you reevaluate the word "love". The best definition you can get from love is from the Bible, the word of God. The Lord teaches us that love never fails no matter what goes on in our life. If love can cover a multitude of sin then love is powerful. We should not abuse love, manipulate love or use it to string along other people. Love is a weapon not to be used lightly but to understand what it really stands for in the world. Never say it if you do not  mean it and do not use it to hurt others. Love is not confusion, not abuse, not anger, not disrespect, not lies, not hidden agendas but love is trust, hope, it perseveres, and most of all LOVE NEVER FAILS!    

5 Things To Do Before 2012

The New Year is vastly approaching and it is getting closer to the countdown of another year. Many have started to recite their New Year's Resolutions however this does not mean anything if you are carrying the same habitual, traditional habits into every year. The year may change but you stay the same every year. It is important that this year you become new with your "new" year. You have to make a decision to become new in mind, body and soul. I am going to share five things I have vowed to myself to do in order to cultivate a "new" me and even greater me in 2012. If you are willing to take the journey then continue to read the steps below:

1. Stop making New Year's Resolutions. Are you flabberghasted by this statement?Yes, you are reading this correctly because a couple of years ago I stop making resolutions and start making goals. Resolution is stated to be an act or declaration (an announcement). However goals produce actions and results for you to accomplish. When you make a resolution you may never accomplish it because you are merely stating it but with a goal you write it down and the vision is becoming more obtainable. Goals are written down to give you an end result for each year. Get a pencil and paper, stop talking to others and make your vision plain by writing down what you expect to accomplish for 2012.
2. Have A Vision Board Party. After you write your vision plain on paper now it is time to make your visualize your goals. When you begin to see your vision come forth on your template (which is the board) then you become excited about the end result. You are excited to work harder towards making your vision a reality. So, Jan 7th, 2012 I am having my first Vision Board Party at my house with some other like minded individuals who are positive thinkers, innovators, and shakers. It is so important you start your New Year off being surrounded around people who are moving in an positive direction for their success. Make a note to yourself before January 2012 is here  schedule a vision board party with like minded individuals.
3. Cultivate Healthy Realtionships. The year 2012 should not be a year where you are bringing the same dead weight into your new year. Before 2011 takes a bow it is important you trash all the toxic relationships in your life. The relationships that have distracted you from becoming great or have distracted you from staying focus on your goals now is time to let those relationships expire by December 31, 2011.
4. Give Back To Yourself 100%. Sowing and reaping is a continous law and principle according to the Bible. If you have sown expect to reap what you have selflessly planted into others. So many people have been taught that it is selfish to give back to yourself. It is important to sow into yourself  so you can reap the full benefits. If you are good ground then why not expect a greater return by investing in yourself. When you give back to yourself it will create an abundance.  You will be able to give back to others out of your abundance and overflow.
5. Embrace The Moment. Too often we want to rush through every process in our life without enjoying the lesson that we have to learn in the situation. Instead of being antsy about getting to the next phase embrace the moment you are currently in at the time. Sometimes we want to rush through the rain without enjoying the growth the rain has to offer. Embrace every big, small, good, bad or diffcult moment because it all is working to build character. (Romans 8:28)

If you learn to start now to do these 5 steps before 2012 then you will prepare yourself for a happier life. You will find more contentment in what you can change and give what you cannot change over to God. Make 2012 a year of fun in the sun, true enough you may have ups and downs but enjoy the journey and keep your faith and trust in the Lord as your GPS to a life fulfilled with His promises.

5 Things To Do Before 2012

The New Year is vastly approaching and it is getting closer to the countdown of another year. Many have started to recite their New Year's Resolutions however this does not mean anything if you are carrying the same habitual, traditional habits into every year. The year may change but you stay the same every year. It is important that this year you become new with your "new" year. You have to make a decision to become new in mind, body and soul. I am going to share five things I have vowed to myself to do in order to cultivate a "new" me and even greater me in 2012. If you are willing to take the journey then continue to read the steps below:

1. Stop making New Year's Resolutions. Are you flabberghasted by this statement?Yes, you are reading this correctly because a couple of years ago I stop making resolutions and start making goals. Resolution is stated to be an act or declaration (an announcement). However goals produce actions and results for you to accomplish. When you make a resolution you may never accomplish it because you are merely stating it but with a goal you write it down and the vision is becoming more obtainable. Goals are written down to give you an end result for each year. Get a pencil and paper, stop talking to others and make your vision plain by writing down what you expect to accomplish for 2012.
2. Have A Vision Board Party. After you write your vision plain on paper now it is time to make your visualize your goals. When you begin to see your vision come forth on your template (which is the board) then you become excited about the end result. You are excited to work harder towards making your vision a reality. So, Jan 7th, 2012 I am having my first Vision Board Party at my house with some other like minded individuals who are positive thinkers, innovators, and shakers. It is so important you start your New Year off being surrounded around people who are moving in an positive direction for their success. Make a note to yourself before January 2012 is here  schedule a vision board party with like minded individuals.
3. Cultivate Healthy Realtionships. The year 2012 should not be a year where you are bringing the same dead weight into your new year. Before 2011 takes a bow it is important you trash all the toxic relationships in your life. The relationships that have distracted you from becoming great or have distracted you from staying focus on your goals now is time to let those relationships expire by December 31, 2011.
4. Give Back To Yourself 100%. Sowing and reaping is a continous law and principle according to the Bible. If you have sown expect to reap what you have selflessly planted into others. So many people have been taught that it is selfish to give back to yourself. It is important to sow into yourself  so you can reap the full benefits. If you are good ground then why not expect a greater return by investing in yourself. When you give back to yourself it will create an abundance.  You will be able to give back to others out of your abundance and overflow.
5. Embrace The Moment. Too often we want to rush through every process in our life without enjoying the lesson that we have to learn in the situation. Instead of being antsy about getting to the next phase embrace the moment you are currently in at the time. Sometimes we want to rush through the rain without enjoying the growth the rain has to offer. Embrace every big, small, good, bad or diffcult moment because it all is working to build character. (Romans 8:28)

If you learn to start now to do these 5 steps before 2012 then you will prepare yourself for a happier life. You will find more contentment in what you can change and give what you cannot change over to God. Make 2012 a year of fun in the sun, true enough you may have ups and downs but enjoy the journey and keep your faith and trust in the Lord as your GPS to a life fulfilled with His promises.

My Resignation Letter To Fear

 When you let fear go and replace it with faith then you can begin to soar high above measure. ~Stylicia~

Below is a resignation letter to fear stating the reason goodbye is necessary for the next transition/level in my life.

How long will you allow fear to paralyze you and keep you from living outside the box? Don't you believe it is time to give fear its walking papers?

Dear Fear,

Today I have made a decision to let you go by letting myself be free. I am turning in my resignation letter because I have been abused, tormented and constantly stressed by your tactics. I am tired of being manipulated by your control and not living the life God created me to live. I have allowed you to transmit your diseases of anxiety, stress, nightmares, paralyzing antics,phobias and everything else stemming from your tree. The last four years have been HELL with you and I am no longer going to stay in this toxic relationship. I want to live a life outside of my comfort zone where survival, mediocrity, depression, settling, tired ,and what if I cant' has been apart of my circle. I am choosing freedom to live life on edge, adventure, fulfillment, success and reaching for the sky. I cannot live in freedom if I continue to work for you so today I let you go. You can no longer hold the death of my daughter over my head to keep me hostage to the four walls of the pit I created through isolation. I know who I am now and no longer accept the false identity that I have carried with me 4 years. I am facing you today in order to live a fearless life. I am no longer scared to take a risk and move forward. I do not know what the future may hold but I am certain that you, "Fear" cannot walk with me in my next season. So I am cutting all ties with you and resigning from the position I use to hold in your company. I have traded it in for the powerful, fearfully and wonderfully made woman I am...

So Long Fear,
Stylicia Bowden

My Resignation Letter To Fear

 When you let fear go and replace it with faith then you can begin to soar high above measure. ~Stylicia~

Below is a resignation letter to fear stating the reason goodbye is necessary for the next transition/level in my life.

How long will you allow fear to paralyze you and keep you from living outside the box? Don't you believe it is time to give fear its walking papers?

Dear Fear,

Today I have made a decision to let you go by letting myself be free. I am turning in my resignation letter because I have been abused, tormented and constantly stressed by your tactics. I am tired of being manipulated by your control and not living the life God created me to live. I have allowed you to transmit your diseases of anxiety, stress, nightmares, paralyzing antics,phobias and everything else stemming from your tree. The last four years have been HELL with you and I am no longer going to stay in this toxic relationship. I want to live a life outside of my comfort zone where survival, mediocrity, depression, settling, tired ,and what if I cant' has been apart of my circle. I am choosing freedom to live life on edge, adventure, fulfillment, success and reaching for the sky. I cannot live in freedom if I continue to work for you so today I let you go. You can no longer hold the death of my daughter over my head to keep me hostage to the four walls of the pit I created through isolation. I know who I am now and no longer accept the false identity that I have carried with me 4 years. I am facing you today in order to live a fearless life. I am no longer scared to take a risk and move forward. I do not know what the future may hold but I am certain that you, "Fear" cannot walk with me in my next season. So I am cutting all ties with you and resigning from the position I use to hold in your company. I have traded it in for the powerful, fearfully and wonderfully made woman I am...

So Long Fear,
Stylicia Bowden

Embrace Your Femininity!

The fragrance of a woman should be light, engaging and intoxicating with delights of purity...~Stylicia~

Before a girl's turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics. Esther 2:12 (NIV Version)

Today I was reminded how beautiful and powerful it is to be a woman. So many times we neglect ourselves and forget that God has created us to be feminine. The word feminine is best described as having the characteristics of a soft,tender and ladylike disposition. Many women lose sight of embracing their womanhood which result in them not taking care of their womanly nature. It is important women understand how significant it is to be the elegant, soft spoken, dainty and attractive lady that God has called us to be. We constantly get caught in distractions which take us away from nurturing our own needs and cares. We have to be aware of what daily regiments are needed for us to survive in a man made world. The essential lifestyle of a woman is pampering herself mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically being immersed in her womanhood. Many women neglect themselves constantly and do not take care of their own needs.It is our job to immerse ourselves in pampering, perfumes and taking care of every aspect and need of our body. We need to care for ourselves whether we buy new clothes, get our hair done, nails done, buy the latest perfume or makeup; this is recognition of us embracing our femininity and tapping into to our feminine nature.It is so important we no longer overlook our own personal needs and put them on the back burner. It is never good for a woman to not care about her well being. A good friend of mine reminded me of how much I had neglected myself by not nurturing by own femininity. She helped me realize how important it was to start taking care of me again. It has been a great 8 months of beautification for myself. Today, God reminded me how beautiful, sweet, and indulging it is to take care of myself. When I went shopping today for perfumes and scents it made me realize how vital it is to take care of my needs first. So, I challenge you to spend 12 months in renewing your mind, body and soul; saturating yourself with your feminine nature.Ladies, never be scared to take care of your needs first and foremost. It is essential to your feminine nature and power you hold within.Never again allow your feminine needs to be put on the back burner. Always take the time to pamper yourself from head to toe, your mind, body & soul cannot live without it!

Embrace Your Femininity!

The fragrance of a woman should be light, engaging and intoxicating with delights of purity...~Stylicia~

Before a girl's turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics. Esther 2:12 (NIV Version)

Today I was reminded how beautiful and powerful it is to be a woman. So many times we neglect ourselves and forget that God has created us to be feminine. The word feminine is best described as having the characteristics of a soft,tender and ladylike disposition. Many women lose sight of embracing their womanhood which result in them not taking care of their womanly nature. It is important women understand how significant it is to be the elegant, soft spoken, dainty and attractive lady that God has called us to be. We constantly get caught in distractions which take us away from nurturing our own needs and cares. We have to be aware of what daily regiments are needed for us to survive in a man made world. The essential lifestyle of a woman is pampering herself mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically being immersed in her womanhood. Many women neglect themselves constantly and do not take care of their own needs.It is our job to immerse ourselves in pampering, perfumes and taking care of every aspect and need of our body. We need to care for ourselves whether we buy new clothes, get our hair done, nails done, buy the latest perfume or makeup; this is recognition of us embracing our femininity and tapping into to our feminine nature.It is so important we no longer overlook our own personal needs and put them on the back burner. It is never good for a woman to not care about her well being. A good friend of mine reminded me of how much I had neglected myself by not nurturing by own femininity. She helped me realize how important it was to start taking care of me again. It has been a great 8 months of beautification for myself. Today, God reminded me how beautiful, sweet, and indulging it is to take care of myself. When I went shopping today for perfumes and scents it made me realize how vital it is to take care of my needs first. So, I challenge you to spend 12 months in renewing your mind, body and soul; saturating yourself with your feminine nature.Ladies, never be scared to take care of your needs first and foremost. It is essential to your feminine nature and power you hold within.Never again allow your feminine needs to be put on the back burner. Always take the time to pamper yourself from head to toe, your mind, body & soul cannot live without it!

The Year Of Celibacy

To know oneself is the epitome of pleasure. ~Stylicia~

Celibacy is considered to be known as the act of abstaining from sexual relations. The synonyms that coincide with this word is as follows: purity,virginity,singleness and virtue. Celibacy is more than abstaining from sexual activity but it is an act of becoming pure in mind, body and soul. It is also the recognition of understanding the importance of becoming one, whole and enjoying singleness.Many women spend their life going from one relationship to the next but feel depleted and empty after each relationship ends. The woman becomes distorted because pieces of her mind, body and soul is scattered across the world with each man that she dated. Instead of taking time to get to know herself she finds herself back in another relationship that pulls her further away from her true self. This cycle is an abusive cycle that many women find themselves participating in everyday. There comes a time when a woman has to make a decision to become whole to help her find her authenticity.

For the first time in my life I decided to take a journey into celibacy being whole in all areas of my life. When I reflect on the 32yrs. of my life I cannot remember a time when I took time to be involved with getting to know myself, my likes, my dislikes, and what I truly wanted in life. I found myself always involved mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually with a man. I constantly gave pieces of myself to them and in this process I begin to lose me. I wanted the man that I was involved with to love me and marry me but the story never ended that way. The truth is I did not know who I was at all. I was passive about what I wanted and was not assertive about getting my needs metin the relationship. I began to settle and accepted whatever that was served to me but in reality I was not being true to myself. However, in April 2011 I decided to take a vow of celibacy in all areas of my life especially in my relationships with men. I attracted the same men over and over but I had to realize it was something in me that had to change. It has been 8 months in my journey of celibacy and it has been the best time in my life for me to get to know who I am and spending quiet time with myself.I have gotten to know what mechanisms makeup "Stylicia". The journey has sometimes been painful facing issues that were hard to face but exposure is important if wholeness is your final destination. The things that you chose not to expose can be the things that will harm you in the end.
I have become one with the person on the inside of me; the person that was dying from malnutrition and needed to live again. I am becoming my AUTHENTIC self day by day. When I make the decision to date and connect back with the outside world I will have a different outlook. I will not attract the same men because my spirit will be whole and healthy. This year of Celibacy has taught me how to celebrate my singleness in a great way. Singleness is a celebration of oneness, wholeness and cultivating healthy relationships. The patterns of dysfunction is terminated when you decide to take control of your life and be the woman God created you to be. No longer letting the real you die on the inside while you become an imitation.

Take a journey into celibacy and become the true you, the woman God has fearfully and wonderfully made you to be!

The Year Of Celibacy

To know oneself is the epitome of pleasure. ~Stylicia~

Celibacy is considered to be known as the act of abstaining from sexual relations. The synonyms that coincide with this word is as follows: purity,virginity,singleness and virtue. Celibacy is more than abstaining from sexual activity but it is an act of becoming pure in mind, body and soul. It is also the recognition of understanding the importance of becoming one, whole and enjoying singleness.Many women spend their life going from one relationship to the next but feel depleted and empty after each relationship ends. The woman becomes distorted because pieces of her mind, body and soul is scattered across the world with each man that she dated. Instead of taking time to get to know herself she finds herself back in another relationship that pulls her further away from her true self. This cycle is an abusive cycle that many women find themselves participating in everyday. There comes a time when a woman has to make a decision to become whole to help her find her authenticity.

For the first time in my life I decided to take a journey into celibacy being whole in all areas of my life. When I reflect on the 32yrs. of my life I cannot remember a time when I took time to be involved with getting to know myself, my likes, my dislikes, and what I truly wanted in life. I found myself always involved mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually with a man. I constantly gave pieces of myself to them and in this process I begin to lose me. I wanted the man that I was involved with to love me and marry me but the story never ended that way. The truth is I did not know who I was at all. I was passive about what I wanted and was not assertive about getting my needs metin the relationship. I began to settle and accepted whatever that was served to me but in reality I was not being true to myself. However, in April 2011 I decided to take a vow of celibacy in all areas of my life especially in my relationships with men. I attracted the same men over and over but I had to realize it was something in me that had to change. It has been 8 months in my journey of celibacy and it has been the best time in my life for me to get to know who I am and spending quiet time with myself.I have gotten to know what mechanisms makeup "Stylicia". The journey has sometimes been painful facing issues that were hard to face but exposure is important if wholeness is your final destination. The things that you chose not to expose can be the things that will harm you in the end.
I have become one with the person on the inside of me; the person that was dying from malnutrition and needed to live again. I am becoming my AUTHENTIC self day by day. When I make the decision to date and connect back with the outside world I will have a different outlook. I will not attract the same men because my spirit will be whole and healthy. This year of Celibacy has taught me how to celebrate my singleness in a great way. Singleness is a celebration of oneness, wholeness and cultivating healthy relationships. The patterns of dysfunction is terminated when you decide to take control of your life and be the woman God created you to be. No longer letting the real you die on the inside while you become an imitation.

Take a journey into celibacy and become the true you, the woman God has fearfully and wonderfully made you to be!