Friday, November 23, 2012

It's Okay To Try Something New!

When new ideas, concepts, thoughts and creativity come knock on your door you have to be brave enough to embrace "that something new"....~Stylicia~ 


The world around us is full of new things but yet we stick with what has become familiar; our home, friends and family is all familiar. Sometimes we are scared to embrace something new. Newness has its own mystery and self discovery for a person to immerse themselves into wholeheartedly. Today I read a news story on Dwayne Michael Carter, Jr aka Lil' Wayne who was deciding to retire from his rapping career. He has become well known for his savvy business skills as a business mogul. He has successfully discovered new rappers such as Drake, Tyga and Nicki Minja. He explained in the article how he has been rapping for 22yrs. If you are thinking what I am thinking this is a very long time to be committed to a talent without exploring other things. He also stated in the article once he is committed to something he is committed to it wholeheartedly (100%).  This statement is a reminder for me to never be so committed to something that I cannot break the commitment to do something else. Sometimes certain commitments are worth breaking when you no longer have a zeal to do them anymore. I think about my own life how I have been writing since I was 8yrs old and have committed myself to be the best writer possible. I was committed to being a great poet but I realize I was neglecting other avenues of my gift. I was more than just a poet spitting poems on the stage I was a writer who wanted to see my articles in every well known magazine and newspaper. Its funny, writing college papers has perfected my skills in writing and challenged me to be a better writer. I would get frustrated writing papers in college on subjects that were completely boring. However, in the end it motivated me to do research to bring out a masterpiece paper. I knew in my heart it was time for me to branch out in different avenues other than poetry. I was getting tired of the traveling, not getting paid what I was worth and no one really appreciating my gift. But the epiphany came where I understood I had to appreciate my writing gift enough not to put it in a box. The truth is I have really started to enjoy blogging because it is my own space to write letters of inspiration to myself. When I started blogging two years ago I had no idea where this blog would go but God gave me ideas little by little. The blog started to evolve into my life journey of becoming a woman and becoming authentic. It was a slow process but near the beginning of this year my blogging journey took flight. Even when the blogging fever ends then I will be challenged to explore other new avenues in my writing. Timing is everything when it comes to trying something new in your life. I believe when that clock of dissatisfaction starts to creep in with one thing then its time to start fresh with something else. When the excitement is gone and there is no more butterflies something new may be creeping in your heart. If you have no passion for it anymore then maybe the passion is meant for something else. Overall, do not be fearful to spread your wings to try something new. I believe it is a brave thing to step out embrace the adrenaline rush of trying something new. Go ahead, it's okay to try something new!

It's Okay To Try Something New!

When new ideas, concepts, thoughts and creativity come knock on your door you have to be brave enough to embrace "that something new"....~Stylicia~ 


The world around us is full of new things but yet we stick with what has become familiar; our home, friends and family is all familiar. Sometimes we are scared to embrace something new. Newness has its own mystery and self discovery for a person to immerse themselves into wholeheartedly. Today I read a news story on Dwayne Michael Carter, Jr aka Lil' Wayne who was deciding to retire from his rapping career. He has become well known for his savvy business skills as a business mogul. He has successfully discovered new rappers such as Drake, Tyga and Nicki Minja. He explained in the article how he has been rapping for 22yrs. If you are thinking what I am thinking this is a very long time to be committed to a talent without exploring other things. He also stated in the article once he is committed to something he is committed to it wholeheartedly (100%).  This statement is a reminder for me to never be so committed to something that I cannot break the commitment to do something else. Sometimes certain commitments are worth breaking when you no longer have a zeal to do them anymore. I think about my own life how I have been writing since I was 8yrs old and have committed myself to be the best writer possible. I was committed to being a great poet but I realize I was neglecting other avenues of my gift. I was more than just a poet spitting poems on the stage I was a writer who wanted to see my articles in every well known magazine and newspaper. Its funny, writing college papers has perfected my skills in writing and challenged me to be a better writer. I would get frustrated writing papers in college on subjects that were completely boring. However, in the end it motivated me to do research to bring out a masterpiece paper. I knew in my heart it was time for me to branch out in different avenues other than poetry. I was getting tired of the traveling, not getting paid what I was worth and no one really appreciating my gift. But the epiphany came where I understood I had to appreciate my writing gift enough not to put it in a box. The truth is I have really started to enjoy blogging because it is my own space to write letters of inspiration to myself. When I started blogging two years ago I had no idea where this blog would go but God gave me ideas little by little. The blog started to evolve into my life journey of becoming a woman and becoming authentic. It was a slow process but near the beginning of this year my blogging journey took flight. Even when the blogging fever ends then I will be challenged to explore other new avenues in my writing. Timing is everything when it comes to trying something new in your life. I believe when that clock of dissatisfaction starts to creep in with one thing then its time to start fresh with something else. When the excitement is gone and there is no more butterflies something new may be creeping in your heart. If you have no passion for it anymore then maybe the passion is meant for something else. Overall, do not be fearful to spread your wings to try something new. I believe it is a brave thing to step out embrace the adrenaline rush of trying something new. Go ahead, it's okay to try something new!

Thursday, November 22, 2012

The Biological Clock

If you are focused on when, what, where & how you will miss out on the now. ~Stylicia~

Lately, I have noticed that specific women I know have confessed their desires to be married and have a kid. They feel like their time is running out and they are never going to get to meet their Boaz. Many women have become fixated on their biological clock running out on them. However, I am a firm believer to understand that God's timing is not predicated on the world's system or timing.  Some women have lost hope on being found and instead of using their time in waiting to work on themselves they have used this time to wallow in loneliness, depression and desperation. I can truthfully say 18 months ago I felt the same way before I started my authentic journey. I tried to make every guy I was involved with my Boaz. This gesture left me empty, used and desperate because I was willing to force the process instead of diligently wait on God. I did not realize the time in waiting was meant for me to become whole. After my last unsuccessful relationship I was faced with the fact that my way was not working so I needed a new plan. Once I yielded my plan unto God I realized I had alot of personal issues that needed to be addressed. I could not be the woman I needed to be in marriage if I did not know the authentic me. I got tired of attracting the same type of guys but quickly I knew it was me that had to change in order for the men to change. I made it a habit to run away from the issues dwelling in my soul. The person I was at the time was dysfunctional. Once I began my journey I had to face a lot of things I was passive about in my life. I was controlling other's lives because my life was out of control. I needed to be true to myself and stop neglecting the woman that was hidden on the inside. So, after the last emotional relationship I decided to get my heart, soul and mind in order. It was time to face my dysfunction and issues. I started my Authentic Journey on April 2011; my life has not been the same. I spent the last 18 months transforming into a new woman. I had no idea who I was because I had a low self worth & self image about myself. I thought sex was love and if a man really got to knew me he would not like me. I understand now that those were false self image mechanisms Satan fed me to believe. I believed them which led me into to the trap of compromise. I compromise my walk with God to fulfill the lust of my flesh. It lead me down a road of having lower self esteem, guilt and shame. However, today I can proudly say that "Stylicia" no longer exist because I know my worth and chose my celibacy journey. I am a new woman learning the new me everyday from my likes to dislikes. I no longer focus on my biological clock because I have become consumed in accomplishing my goals and enjoying life to the fullest. I do know I desire to be married but I am in no rush for it until I am whole. Instead of being consumed with counting down when my biological clock will expire I have been enjoying the time I have being a single woman.I did not cherish my single-hood before but now I can cherish it to the utmost. I have fell in love with this time of soul searching and loving myself totally and completely. So, you single ladies who feel like you will never meet "the one" or your eggs are about to be rotten before you can give birth to another child just remember Sarah (in the bible) was almost 100 years old when she conceived. Stop focusing on the when, who, what and how. While in waiting, this is the perfect time to deal with your  dysfunction & issues. This time should be used to live life to the fullest and finding your purpose. Waiting is preparing.....

The Biological Clock

If you are focused on when, what, where & how you will miss out on the now. ~Stylicia~

Lately, I have noticed that specific women I know have confessed their desires to be married and have a kid. They feel like their time is running out and they are never going to get to meet their Boaz. Many women have become fixated on their biological clock running out on them. However, I am a firm believer to understand that God's timing is not predicated on the world's system or timing.  Some women have lost hope on being found and instead of using their time in waiting to work on themselves they have used this time to wallow in loneliness, depression and desperation. I can truthfully say 18 months ago I felt the same way before I started my authentic journey. I tried to make every guy I was involved with my Boaz. This gesture left me empty, used and desperate because I was willing to force the process instead of diligently wait on God. I did not realize the time in waiting was meant for me to become whole. After my last unsuccessful relationship I was faced with the fact that my way was not working so I needed a new plan. Once I yielded my plan unto God I realized I had alot of personal issues that needed to be addressed. I could not be the woman I needed to be in marriage if I did not know the authentic me. I got tired of attracting the same type of guys but quickly I knew it was me that had to change in order for the men to change. I made it a habit to run away from the issues dwelling in my soul. The person I was at the time was dysfunctional. Once I began my journey I had to face a lot of things I was passive about in my life. I was controlling other's lives because my life was out of control. I needed to be true to myself and stop neglecting the woman that was hidden on the inside. So, after the last emotional relationship I decided to get my heart, soul and mind in order. It was time to face my dysfunction and issues. I started my Authentic Journey on April 2011; my life has not been the same. I spent the last 18 months transforming into a new woman. I had no idea who I was because I had a low self worth & self image about myself. I thought sex was love and if a man really got to knew me he would not like me. I understand now that those were false self image mechanisms Satan fed me to believe. I believed them which led me into to the trap of compromise. I compromise my walk with God to fulfill the lust of my flesh. It lead me down a road of having lower self esteem, guilt and shame. However, today I can proudly say that "Stylicia" no longer exist because I know my worth and chose my celibacy journey. I am a new woman learning the new me everyday from my likes to dislikes. I no longer focus on my biological clock because I have become consumed in accomplishing my goals and enjoying life to the fullest. I do know I desire to be married but I am in no rush for it until I am whole. Instead of being consumed with counting down when my biological clock will expire I have been enjoying the time I have being a single woman.I did not cherish my single-hood before but now I can cherish it to the utmost. I have fell in love with this time of soul searching and loving myself totally and completely. So, you single ladies who feel like you will never meet "the one" or your eggs are about to be rotten before you can give birth to another child just remember Sarah (in the bible) was almost 100 years old when she conceived. Stop focusing on the when, who, what and how. While in waiting, this is the perfect time to deal with your  dysfunction & issues. This time should be used to live life to the fullest and finding your purpose. Waiting is preparing.....

Monday, November 19, 2012

The Individuality Factor: The Nonconformist

Individuality is a beautiful freedom to be totally you.~Stylicia~

In this world we live in being different can sometimes be frowned upon but being an individual carries a lot of freedom yet it also carries a lot of weight. Those who live in a country where conformity is the ideal thing may have a hard time embracing individuality. When I was in the military we all looked alike because we were forced to wear the same uniform. As I begin to spread my wings I realize I was a nonconformist. It was never meant for me to fit in because I embraced my individuality. When you grow up you are never taught that being an individual is powerful. You are taught to do what others tell you to do, be respectful and follow all the rules. Children are never challenged to step outside of their comfort zone and be unique. It is expected for them to go through school make good grades, graduate from high school, go to college and then get married to have kids. However, life is unpredictable and what if they are sidetracked by life unexpected detours, how can they be prepared to stay the course. I believe as parents it is important to teach our kids to be individuals. Let them know its okay not to be in the "popular crowd". It is important to teach them to be who they were created to be. It is such an injustice to not allow children or even ourselves to be the individual that God created us to be. I am challenged everyday to teach my daughter to be an individual and nonconformist. I make sure I actively let her express her individuality in all creative avenues. There is a great amount of freedom with being an individual because it taps into your authenticity. When you are an individual you become a nonconformist. It is a great freedom to be true to who you really are within. 

I would always have issues conforming to things in my military lifestyle because a big part of me wanted to be free. My nine year journey in the military revealed to me that I was such a nonconformist. I believe to some degree I chose to conform to be accepted by the majority. I was never truly happy with being squashed into the status quo of average. When I decided to release myself from the prison of conformity that is when I truly saw my transformation. As I grew from a young lady to a grown woman I truly began to outgrow the box that I was securely placed in those nine years. It was time to break free so I could become the woman God wanted me to be. I was challenged by this new genre of freedom to no longer be meshed with a group of people. I stood out like a widows peak and a part of me wanted to run back to the shelter of belonging but I knew I no longer fit in. It was never meant for me to conform to fit in but it was always meant for me to embrace my individuality and just be true to myself. So many people look for a certain movement to join to feel good about themselves because they are apart of something. But individuality takes courage to defy the odds just to say, "I cannot conform, I will not conform because I am an Authentic Masterpiece". 

Here are a couple of nonconformist I admire (some on this list are deceased but still are iconic):

1) President Barrack Obama
2) Ledisi
3) Mary J. Blige
4) Rihanna
5) Solange Knowles
6) Katy Perry
7) Marilyn Monroe
8) Whitney Houston
9) Bette Davis
10) Britney Spears
11) Lucille Ball
12) First Lady Michelle Obama
13) Jada Pinkett

The list is continuous....  

P.S. Ask Yourself Are You A Conformist or Nonconformist? be honest with yourself.....

The Individuality Factor: The Nonconformist

Individuality is a beautiful freedom to be totally you.~Stylicia~

In this world we live in being different can sometimes be frowned upon but being an individual carries a lot of freedom yet it also carries a lot of weight. Those who live in a country where conformity is the ideal thing may have a hard time embracing individuality. When I was in the military we all looked alike because we were forced to wear the same uniform. As I begin to spread my wings I realize I was a nonconformist. It was never meant for me to fit in because I embraced my individuality. When you grow up you are never taught that being an individual is powerful. You are taught to do what others tell you to do, be respectful and follow all the rules. Children are never challenged to step outside of their comfort zone and be unique. It is expected for them to go through school make good grades, graduate from high school, go to college and then get married to have kids. However, life is unpredictable and what if they are sidetracked by life unexpected detours, how can they be prepared to stay the course. I believe as parents it is important to teach our kids to be individuals. Let them know its okay not to be in the "popular crowd". It is important to teach them to be who they were created to be. It is such an injustice to not allow children or even ourselves to be the individual that God created us to be. I am challenged everyday to teach my daughter to be an individual and nonconformist. I make sure I actively let her express her individuality in all creative avenues. There is a great amount of freedom with being an individual because it taps into your authenticity. When you are an individual you become a nonconformist. It is a great freedom to be true to who you really are within. 

I would always have issues conforming to things in my military lifestyle because a big part of me wanted to be free. My nine year journey in the military revealed to me that I was such a nonconformist. I believe to some degree I chose to conform to be accepted by the majority. I was never truly happy with being squashed into the status quo of average. When I decided to release myself from the prison of conformity that is when I truly saw my transformation. As I grew from a young lady to a grown woman I truly began to outgrow the box that I was securely placed in those nine years. It was time to break free so I could become the woman God wanted me to be. I was challenged by this new genre of freedom to no longer be meshed with a group of people. I stood out like a widows peak and a part of me wanted to run back to the shelter of belonging but I knew I no longer fit in. It was never meant for me to conform to fit in but it was always meant for me to embrace my individuality and just be true to myself. So many people look for a certain movement to join to feel good about themselves because they are apart of something. But individuality takes courage to defy the odds just to say, "I cannot conform, I will not conform because I am an Authentic Masterpiece". 

Here are a couple of nonconformist I admire (some on this list are deceased but still are iconic):

1) President Barrack Obama
2) Ledisi
3) Mary J. Blige
4) Rihanna
5) Solange Knowles
6) Katy Perry
7) Marilyn Monroe
8) Whitney Houston
9) Bette Davis
10) Britney Spears
11) Lucille Ball
12) First Lady Michelle Obama
13) Jada Pinkett

The list is continuous....  

P.S. Ask Yourself Are You A Conformist or Nonconformist? be honest with yourself.....

Friday, November 16, 2012

Authentic Fridays Guest Blogger: Ellena Balkcom


The Simple Truth
“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.

Many years ago, early in our marriage, I bought my husband a magnet with this quote. It’s very simple, but quite powerful at the same time. I loved it and I knew it spoke to where we were at the time. We were young and full of hopes, dreams and expectations of great things for our lives. Needless to say, it continues to speak to where we are. We understand now that you don’t ever outgrow or out-achieve the relevance of its meaning, since the journey of dreaming and living is a continuous one.  Since then, Thomas and I collectively have purchased several knick knacks with this quote for both ourselves and others. I guess it’s become sort of a family mantra.
Well, while recently doing research for a writing project at work, I stumbled across Mr. Thoreau’s quote and noticed that a second line was added. Apparently, all my knick knacks didn’t have the quote in its entirety! I’m sure this was just the manufacturer’s way of saving space on small items like magnets and bookmarks, but I was a bit surprised that after all these years, I’ve only been getting only half the message. The entire quote actually reads:
“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you
simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.” ~Henry David Thoreau
Again, simple, but powerful! When googling “laws of the universe,” many things popped up. Everything surfaced from the super scientific to the theological and astrological. When one search revealed a broad definition of the 7 Laws of the Universe, it said, “The best definition of Natural Law seems to be that it is the uniform and orderly method of the omnipotent God. Unlike any other form of animal life that has been created, we were given the power of choice or free will; along with this power came certain responsibilities.” After reading this and the complete definition of laws listed on the site, the truth became very clear and simple to me: 1. God has a natural order that our life should mimic, 2. We should trust that God knows and sees all, 3. We have the power to choose every moment and in every situation, and 4. With our choices, come responsibility and consequences (good or bad). Why do we make it so much more complicated?!
For me, as I leave one year and enter another, I desire more than anything, simplicity in my life as it relates to cleaning out the mental, material, and emotional clutter, trimming the physical and financial fat, focusing on the things that really matter and living the life I always imagined for myself and my family. This will allow me to go confidently in the direction of my dreams and actually live the purpose for which I was put on this earth. This may mean saying “no” more, putting my needs and the needs of my family first more, staying focused on the goal without distraction and it may even mean not attempting to be everything to everybody. It turns out that I’ve been making it much harder than it needs to be.
To all of you, I say simplify your life as well, so that the laws of your universe will also be simpler. It just shouldn’t be that complicated in 2012.
An abbreviated version of the 7 laws state:
  1. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation: 

    The law of attraction will deliver to you what you do not want as quickly and as certainly as it will deliver what you do want.
  2. The Law of Relativity: 

    In the study of this law, we find that all things are relative. All laws are related to each other and correspond with each other. The laws of the little are the laws of the great. There is no big nor small, fast nor slow, except by comparison. Whenever the law is properly used, you win. Let's remember that everyone does something better than you and, likewise, you do something better than every person you meet. When you relate something you do that you are not proficient at, to something another person does that they have mastered, you will not look good. You are using the law against yourself. Begin using this law to heighten your self esteem. You will then become aware of how special you are in the light of truth.
  3. The Law of Vibration and Attraction: 

    Everything in the universe vibrates...nothing rests. We really do live in an ocean of motion. This truly contains the great secret of life. You are always moving toward something and it is always moving toward you... it's action and attraction. Thought is the most potent vibration and remember that you can think...that makes you a very special creation (God's greatest masterpiece). You should always be delighted with yourself. (All creation begins in thought.)
  4. The Law of Polarity: 

    Everything in the universe has its opposite. There would be no inside to a room without an outside. If something you considered bad happens in your life, there has to be something good about it. If it was only a little bad, when you mentally work your way around to the other side, you will find it will only be a little good.
  5. The Law of Rhythm: 

    The law of rhythm embodies the truth that everything is moving to and fro, flowing in and out, swinging backward and forward. There is a high and a low tide. Everything is flowing, both in and out, in accordance with the law. There is always a reaction to every action. You are not going to feel good all the time; No one does. If you did, you wouldn't even know it. The low feelings are what permit you to enjoy the high feelings. There will always be highs and lows in life. Reason gives us the ability to choose our thoughts (that is free will). Even when you are on a natural down swing, you can choose good thoughts with your free will and continue to move up toward your goal.
  6. The Law of Cause and Effect: 

    Every cause has its effect; every effect, its cause. There is no such thing as chance. Everything happens according to law. Your physical health, your relationships, the respect you earn, your material income. You must concentrate on the cause, and the effect will automatically take care of itself. That is how the law works.
  7. The Law of Gender: 

    The law of gender manifests in all things as masculine and feminine. It is this law that governs what we know as creation. This is in truth, the creative law. This law decrees everything in nature is both male and female. Both are required for life to exist. This law also decrees that all seeds (ideas are spiritual seeds) have a gestation or incubation period before they manifest. In other words, when you choose a goal or build the image in your mind, a definite period of time must elapse before that image manifests in physical results. 

Ellena Balkcom is Founder and CEO of Written On Purpose Communications (writtenonpurpose.com), creator of the Voice I.D. System of Communication Branding and a former Walt Disney Company Communications professional with nearly 20 years of experience in Marketing, Internal and External Communications. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter @WrittnOnPurpose.

Authentic Fridays Guest Blogger: Ellena Balkcom


The Simple Truth
“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined.

Many years ago, early in our marriage, I bought my husband a magnet with this quote. It’s very simple, but quite powerful at the same time. I loved it and I knew it spoke to where we were at the time. We were young and full of hopes, dreams and expectations of great things for our lives. Needless to say, it continues to speak to where we are. We understand now that you don’t ever outgrow or out-achieve the relevance of its meaning, since the journey of dreaming and living is a continuous one.  Since then, Thomas and I collectively have purchased several knick knacks with this quote for both ourselves and others. I guess it’s become sort of a family mantra.
Well, while recently doing research for a writing project at work, I stumbled across Mr. Thoreau’s quote and noticed that a second line was added. Apparently, all my knick knacks didn’t have the quote in its entirety! I’m sure this was just the manufacturer’s way of saving space on small items like magnets and bookmarks, but I was a bit surprised that after all these years, I’ve only been getting only half the message. The entire quote actually reads:
“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you
simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.” ~Henry David Thoreau
Again, simple, but powerful! When googling “laws of the universe,” many things popped up. Everything surfaced from the super scientific to the theological and astrological. When one search revealed a broad definition of the 7 Laws of the Universe, it said, “The best definition of Natural Law seems to be that it is the uniform and orderly method of the omnipotent God. Unlike any other form of animal life that has been created, we were given the power of choice or free will; along with this power came certain responsibilities.” After reading this and the complete definition of laws listed on the site, the truth became very clear and simple to me: 1. God has a natural order that our life should mimic, 2. We should trust that God knows and sees all, 3. We have the power to choose every moment and in every situation, and 4. With our choices, come responsibility and consequences (good or bad). Why do we make it so much more complicated?!
For me, as I leave one year and enter another, I desire more than anything, simplicity in my life as it relates to cleaning out the mental, material, and emotional clutter, trimming the physical and financial fat, focusing on the things that really matter and living the life I always imagined for myself and my family. This will allow me to go confidently in the direction of my dreams and actually live the purpose for which I was put on this earth. This may mean saying “no” more, putting my needs and the needs of my family first more, staying focused on the goal without distraction and it may even mean not attempting to be everything to everybody. It turns out that I’ve been making it much harder than it needs to be.
To all of you, I say simplify your life as well, so that the laws of your universe will also be simpler. It just shouldn’t be that complicated in 2012.
An abbreviated version of the 7 laws state:
  1. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation: 

    The law of attraction will deliver to you what you do not want as quickly and as certainly as it will deliver what you do want.
  2. The Law of Relativity: 

    In the study of this law, we find that all things are relative. All laws are related to each other and correspond with each other. The laws of the little are the laws of the great. There is no big nor small, fast nor slow, except by comparison. Whenever the law is properly used, you win. Let's remember that everyone does something better than you and, likewise, you do something better than every person you meet. When you relate something you do that you are not proficient at, to something another person does that they have mastered, you will not look good. You are using the law against yourself. Begin using this law to heighten your self esteem. You will then become aware of how special you are in the light of truth.
  3. The Law of Vibration and Attraction: 

    Everything in the universe vibrates...nothing rests. We really do live in an ocean of motion. This truly contains the great secret of life. You are always moving toward something and it is always moving toward you... it's action and attraction. Thought is the most potent vibration and remember that you can think...that makes you a very special creation (God's greatest masterpiece). You should always be delighted with yourself. (All creation begins in thought.)
  4. The Law of Polarity: 

    Everything in the universe has its opposite. There would be no inside to a room without an outside. If something you considered bad happens in your life, there has to be something good about it. If it was only a little bad, when you mentally work your way around to the other side, you will find it will only be a little good.
  5. The Law of Rhythm: 

    The law of rhythm embodies the truth that everything is moving to and fro, flowing in and out, swinging backward and forward. There is a high and a low tide. Everything is flowing, both in and out, in accordance with the law. There is always a reaction to every action. You are not going to feel good all the time; No one does. If you did, you wouldn't even know it. The low feelings are what permit you to enjoy the high feelings. There will always be highs and lows in life. Reason gives us the ability to choose our thoughts (that is free will). Even when you are on a natural down swing, you can choose good thoughts with your free will and continue to move up toward your goal.
  6. The Law of Cause and Effect: 

    Every cause has its effect; every effect, its cause. There is no such thing as chance. Everything happens according to law. Your physical health, your relationships, the respect you earn, your material income. You must concentrate on the cause, and the effect will automatically take care of itself. That is how the law works.
  7. The Law of Gender: 

    The law of gender manifests in all things as masculine and feminine. It is this law that governs what we know as creation. This is in truth, the creative law. This law decrees everything in nature is both male and female. Both are required for life to exist. This law also decrees that all seeds (ideas are spiritual seeds) have a gestation or incubation period before they manifest. In other words, when you choose a goal or build the image in your mind, a definite period of time must elapse before that image manifests in physical results. 

Ellena Balkcom is Founder and CEO of Written On Purpose Communications (writtenonpurpose.com), creator of the Voice I.D. System of Communication Branding and a former Walt Disney Company Communications professional with nearly 20 years of experience in Marketing, Internal and External Communications. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter @WrittnOnPurpose.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

This Girl Is On Fire!

“Becoming my new self, some people didn’t understand me anymore. Some people who I knew for years—we couldn’t be on the same page anymore. That’s OK because that’s part of growing, too. The hardest thing is to trust yourself, to know that what you’re feeling is valid. A lot of times we dismiss our feelings. I realized that I can trust myself and say, ‘No, I’m not comfortable with that.’ That was the toughest part. When I finally had the bravery to do that, that’s when I started to feel on fire.” ~Alicia Keys (intercept from Complex Mag Interview Nov 13, 2012)



I remember clear as day when I first became a fan of Alicia Keys it was while I was stationed in Jacksonville, Florida. I heard her first hit song Fallin' off her debut album Songs in A Minor, her vocals and talent blew me away. It was refreshing to hear a woman singer who sung about positive things and showcased women in a positive manner. In all her videos Keys always kept it classy and I truly respect her for that. She has changed throughout the years but I can truly say I have changed with her in her musical journey. I can honestly say I own every album from Song in A Minor to The Element of Freedom. When I first heard Girl On Fire I realized there was a new Alicia emerging from a new place. I did not automatically love it but because I am a fan I was urged to read the lyrics to the song. Once I read the lyrics to the song I became a fan of this song because I could relate to the words she bellowed out. Girl On Fire is a true testament of my journey into a brand new me and embracing the new person I am right now. Alicia Keys new album is entitled "Girl On Fire" with two hit songs already New Day (which is my favorite song thus far) and Girl on Fire. Girl On Fire is so motivating to me because after losing my two year old daughter five years ago a new me was emerging from the pain, bitterness, anger and so many other embedded emotions. Through this life altering event I was faced to deal with my personal issues from passiveness, mental & emotional abuse, self neglect, toxic relationships, growing apart in friendships and so much more. The song is a true testament of my evolution and embracing a better me, a whole new me on a whole new level. Although I have changed I refuse to let anyone put me back in the box, I am striving to stay on fire for what I want to accomplish in life. I stop making excuses and start making things happen in my life to me that is the true definition of a Girl On Fire. I even had to add this song to my morning inspirational list because when the world sometimes get too surreal I have to be reminded that the road may be lonely but I will stay on fire for all that I am setting my mind to accomplish while I am still on this Earth. Alicia Keys is truly a Girl On Fire who is not scared to grow, fly and leave some things behind. After reading the interview from  Complex magazine I became more of a fan because she really explained where she is in her life and how being the new her is refreshing. She also talked about the graduation from a girl to a woman which I can relate to that on all levels (LOL). I have been a girl trapped for a long time but when I turned 30 the woman in me started to emerge I started to focus on nurturing myself more and taking care of me. I no longer put myself on the back burner but started to feel comfortable in my skin. I really started living and stop taking life for granted. I had to step back, reflect and meditate on where I want to go and what I wanted to do; in this redefining moment I could relate to being a Girl On Fire who now has became a woman on fire!

Here is a couple of quote commentary from Alicia Keys interview with Complex Magazine interview (November 13, 2012) that stood out to me:

It’s not a departure. It’s growth. I love the way that I’ve been able to go deeper into my lyrics and my songwriting and go to a place I was too afraid to access before.

Because I started so young, so much of my life has been like catching up to myself—or trying to run underneath myself so I’m not falling. I finally stepped back and was able to look at it all and say ‘Wow.’ No complaints. I’m glad to be where I am and have this life. But it could be different. I don’t want to have the type of life where I’m not living or I’m always working or always fitting into whatever perfect box. I don’t want that type of hectic life. I don’t want people in my life that encourage that in any way. I’m not my old self anymore.

Becoming my new self, some people didn’t understand me anymore. Some people who I knew for years—we couldn’t be on the same page anymore. That’s OK because that’s part of growing, too. The hardest thing is to trust yourself, to know that what you’re feeling is valid. A lot of times we dismiss our feelings. I realized that I can trust myself and say, ‘No, I’m not comfortable with that.’ That was the toughest part. When I finally had the bravery to do that, that’s when I started to feel on fire.

The whole freaking world is looking at your [stuff]. It’s scary. I didn’t want to say every single thing because you don’t want people to know that. There’s personal and there’s public, and I deserve the right to have a personal space.

References: Kenner, R. (2012, November 13). Retrieved from Complex: http://www.complex.com/music/2012/11/alicia-keys-december-2012-january-2013-cover-story/page/2



This Girl Is On Fire!

“Becoming my new self, some people didn’t understand me anymore. Some people who I knew for years—we couldn’t be on the same page anymore. That’s OK because that’s part of growing, too. The hardest thing is to trust yourself, to know that what you’re feeling is valid. A lot of times we dismiss our feelings. I realized that I can trust myself and say, ‘No, I’m not comfortable with that.’ That was the toughest part. When I finally had the bravery to do that, that’s when I started to feel on fire.” ~Alicia Keys (intercept from Complex Mag Interview Nov 13, 2012)



I remember clear as day when I first became a fan of Alicia Keys it was while I was stationed in Jacksonville, Florida. I heard her first hit song Fallin' off her debut album Songs in A Minor, her vocals and talent blew me away. It was refreshing to hear a woman singer who sung about positive things and showcased women in a positive manner. In all her videos Keys always kept it classy and I truly respect her for that. She has changed throughout the years but I can truly say I have changed with her in her musical journey. I can honestly say I own every album from Song in A Minor to The Element of Freedom. When I first heard Girl On Fire I realized there was a new Alicia emerging from a new place. I did not automatically love it but because I am a fan I was urged to read the lyrics to the song. Once I read the lyrics to the song I became a fan of this song because I could relate to the words she bellowed out. Girl On Fire is a true testament of my journey into a brand new me and embracing the new person I am right now. Alicia Keys new album is entitled "Girl On Fire" with two hit songs already New Day (which is my favorite song thus far) and Girl on Fire. Girl On Fire is so motivating to me because after losing my two year old daughter five years ago a new me was emerging from the pain, bitterness, anger and so many other embedded emotions. Through this life altering event I was faced to deal with my personal issues from passiveness, mental & emotional abuse, self neglect, toxic relationships, growing apart in friendships and so much more. The song is a true testament of my evolution and embracing a better me, a whole new me on a whole new level. Although I have changed I refuse to let anyone put me back in the box, I am striving to stay on fire for what I want to accomplish in life. I stop making excuses and start making things happen in my life to me that is the true definition of a Girl On Fire. I even had to add this song to my morning inspirational list because when the world sometimes get too surreal I have to be reminded that the road may be lonely but I will stay on fire for all that I am setting my mind to accomplish while I am still on this Earth. Alicia Keys is truly a Girl On Fire who is not scared to grow, fly and leave some things behind. After reading the interview from  Complex magazine I became more of a fan because she really explained where she is in her life and how being the new her is refreshing. She also talked about the graduation from a girl to a woman which I can relate to that on all levels (LOL). I have been a girl trapped for a long time but when I turned 30 the woman in me started to emerge I started to focus on nurturing myself more and taking care of me. I no longer put myself on the back burner but started to feel comfortable in my skin. I really started living and stop taking life for granted. I had to step back, reflect and meditate on where I want to go and what I wanted to do; in this redefining moment I could relate to being a Girl On Fire who now has became a woman on fire!

Here is a couple of quote commentary from Alicia Keys interview with Complex Magazine interview (November 13, 2012) that stood out to me:

It’s not a departure. It’s growth. I love the way that I’ve been able to go deeper into my lyrics and my songwriting and go to a place I was too afraid to access before.

Because I started so young, so much of my life has been like catching up to myself—or trying to run underneath myself so I’m not falling. I finally stepped back and was able to look at it all and say ‘Wow.’ No complaints. I’m glad to be where I am and have this life. But it could be different. I don’t want to have the type of life where I’m not living or I’m always working or always fitting into whatever perfect box. I don’t want that type of hectic life. I don’t want people in my life that encourage that in any way. I’m not my old self anymore.

Becoming my new self, some people didn’t understand me anymore. Some people who I knew for years—we couldn’t be on the same page anymore. That’s OK because that’s part of growing, too. The hardest thing is to trust yourself, to know that what you’re feeling is valid. A lot of times we dismiss our feelings. I realized that I can trust myself and say, ‘No, I’m not comfortable with that.’ That was the toughest part. When I finally had the bravery to do that, that’s when I started to feel on fire.

The whole freaking world is looking at your [stuff]. It’s scary. I didn’t want to say every single thing because you don’t want people to know that. There’s personal and there’s public, and I deserve the right to have a personal space.

References: Kenner, R. (2012, November 13). Retrieved from Complex: http://www.complex.com/music/2012/11/alicia-keys-december-2012-january-2013-cover-story/page/2



Tuesday, November 13, 2012

To My Readership Community


When I began my blog I had no idea how much it would bless me to bless others to open up about my journey through the ups and downs of my womanhood. It is always my desire to uplift and inspire women across the world to be authentic, transparent and unapologetic about how God created you. You are who you are so be the best you because you are fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator, Jesus Christ!

I would also like to thank all those who constantly view my blog and take the time to read it. Thank You to all my readership community in the US, Russia, United Kingdom, Poland, Canada, India, Germany, Greece, Ireland, Indonesia and many more countries. I am so appreciative of those who are touched by the words I pour out on my blog. Thank you for being apart of The Inspirational Corner Movement.

Here is a short profile on what I love, like and cherish for you, my readers to get to know me even more.

Favorite Movies For Inspiration
  • Love Jones
  • Eat, Pray and Love
  • Breakfast at Tiffany's 
  • Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
  • Alice & The Wonderland
  • Julia & Julie
And so many more....

Favorite Colors
  • Red
  • Purple
  • Pink
  • Orange
Favorite Actresses
  • Julia Roberts
  • Angela Bassett
Favorite Actors
  • Denzel Washington
Favorite Iconic Women
  • Bette Davis
  • Marilyn Monroe
  • Audrey Hepburn
  • Michelle Obama
  • Lucille Ball
  • Maya Angelou
  • Ruby Dee
Favorite Pastimes
  • Reading
  • Broadway Shows
  • Wine Tasting
  • Shopping at thrift store & consignment shops
  • Family Time w/ my daughter
  • Traveling 
  • Meeting New & Interesting people
Favorite Magazines
  • Essence
  • Elle 
  • Architectural Design
What career I would love to do:
  • Wardrobe Stylist
  • Fashion Writer
  • College Professor
  • Travel Agent 
Life is full of living so do not stop living until you are full of life!




To My Readership Community


When I began my blog I had no idea how much it would bless me to bless others to open up about my journey through the ups and downs of my womanhood. It is always my desire to uplift and inspire women across the world to be authentic, transparent and unapologetic about how God created you. You are who you are so be the best you because you are fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator, Jesus Christ!

I would also like to thank all those who constantly view my blog and take the time to read it. Thank You to all my readership community in the US, Russia, United Kingdom, Poland, Canada, India, Germany, Greece, Ireland, Indonesia and many more countries. I am so appreciative of those who are touched by the words I pour out on my blog. Thank you for being apart of The Inspirational Corner Movement.

Here is a short profile on what I love, like and cherish for you, my readers to get to know me even more.

Favorite Movies For Inspiration
  • Love Jones
  • Eat, Pray and Love
  • Breakfast at Tiffany's 
  • Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory
  • Alice & The Wonderland
  • Julia & Julie
And so many more....

Favorite Colors
  • Red
  • Purple
  • Pink
  • Orange
Favorite Actresses
  • Julia Roberts
  • Angela Bassett
Favorite Actors
  • Denzel Washington
Favorite Iconic Women
  • Bette Davis
  • Marilyn Monroe
  • Audrey Hepburn
  • Michelle Obama
  • Lucille Ball
  • Maya Angelou
  • Ruby Dee
Favorite Pastimes
  • Reading
  • Broadway Shows
  • Wine Tasting
  • Shopping at thrift store & consignment shops
  • Family Time w/ my daughter
  • Traveling 
  • Meeting New & Interesting people
Favorite Magazines
  • Essence
  • Elle 
  • Architectural Design
What career I would love to do:
  • Wardrobe Stylist
  • Fashion Writer
  • College Professor
  • Travel Agent 
Life is full of living so do not stop living until you are full of life!




Monday, November 12, 2012

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!



Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!

5 Lessons Learned Through Life, Love & Friendship!

As the year comes to an end I reflect on how much has happen this year in my life. I realize all the things have worked out for the better even when I had no concept of why they happen. I learned valuable lessons from growing in life, loving myself unconditionally and redefining the word friend after a 14 year friendship ended. All of these things made me stronger, wiser and better. Each high and low point in my life challenged me to reevaluate myself, work on my personal issues and move forward. In 2012  I have learned to stop reminiscing on the past, holding on to pain and understand the power of forgiveness. I want to share with you five powerful lessons I have learned on my new journey as I embrace the new me...New Faces, Places & Spaces!



Lessons Learned on Love...

1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides. 

2) Love Will Find You....
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire....I have an new attitude about living life which is...I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!

Lessons Learned on Life

 3) Life is what you create it to be.....
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!

Lessons Learned From Friendships....

4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door....
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!

5) Tolerate and Celebrate....
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.

2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!